


I Might Need You More Than I Think I Do

by YamatoMyTomato (KinoKahn)



Series: Kakayama Week 2015 [3]
Category: Naruto
Genre: Awkward Sexual Situations, KakaYama - Freeform, KakaYama Week 2015, M/M, Minor Character Death, Nohara Rin Lives, Non-Graphic Description of Injuries, OCs - Freeform, Original Character Death(s), how they got together
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-22
Updated: 2016-02-29
Packaged: 2018-04-22 20:40:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 35,288
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4849811
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KinoKahn/pseuds/YamatoMyTomato
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A mission goes badly, and everything starts to fall apart (or maybe it's falling into place).  Tenzou isn't sure where he stands anymore, but he is sure that Kakashi's skin is the warmest thing he's ever touched.</p>
<p>Kakayama Week 2015 - Day Two: ANBU</p>
<p>*All chapters edited & updated as of 02/29/2016*</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This fic was originally intended for KakaYama Week 2015 but then it quickly took over my life. I've been working on it for the past six months. Additionally, I edited and re-posted the first 4 chapters I had posted. The plot remains the same and so does the content for the most part, so if you've been reading this since I first started posting it, don't feel obligated to re-start it. All you're missing out on is some tightened prose and a few minor dialogue changes.
> 
> If you've read/are interested in my other Kakashi/Yamato fics, this fic is intended as somewhat of a prequel to my [Kakashi and Yamato's Terrible Adventures in Terrible Sex](http://archiveofourown.org/series/224189) series.

He and Kakashi had traveled in silence for the entire day, and Tenzou’s patience was starting to wear thin. He wasn’t a very chatty guy, but he liked talking to Kakashi. But Kakashi was oddly focused on the mission this time. Not to say Kakashi didn’t focus normally, but he would typically at least call for a bathroom break at some point during the day and crack some inappropriate jokes. Maybe even tell Tenzou the plot of whatever trashy erotica book he was currently reading. This day, Tenzou noted, Kakashi had abnormally dark circles under his visible eye, and was prone to staring unfocused off in the distance more than usual.

The mission was theoretically highly ranked, but a two-man ANBU squad taking on five mid-skilled rogue ninjas was standard fare. Yugao had offered to go, but Kakashi had declined on the grounds that it was unnecessary. A mission like this didn’t need two ANBU captains, and considering the crop of fresh recruits back at the base it was probably for the best that both captains weren’t gone simultaneously. Honestly, it was something that a non-ANBU team would have been assigned if it weren’t for the fact that three of the rogues were ex-Konoha and they had stolen some classified research confiscated from Orochimaru a few years prior.

The sun had set and the stars were beginning to emerge when they reached the northern edge of the Land of Fire and decided to stop for the night. Tenzou could feel his face pulling into that slightly pinched look he got whenever he had gone too long without talking. Despite the fact that some of his fellow ANBU ninjas told him he was too taciturn for his own good, Tenzou liked talking. At least, he liked talking to the people he liked. He understood the importance of silence, and he could be very quiet when he felt like it, but still, he liked talking.

Tenzou started laying out their bed rolls on the softest spot of ground available while Kakashi dug cold rations out of their packs. They were too close to the border to even consider lighting a fire, so they were stuck with terrible chakra-enhancing pellets and granola bars that tasted more like bark than granola.

“One of the shinobi we’re taking on is an expert in fire jutsu, right?” Tenzou asked. He had read the briefings; he had this stuff memorized. He was just looking for small talk and the mission was all he could think of at the moment.

Kakashi tossed him a granola bar and Tenzou caught it. In the moments the granola bar flew through the air, Tenzou found himself watching the pull and shift of Kakashi’s arm muscles. Tenzou allowed himself a second to appreciate the ANBU uniform and it’s bicep-baring shirts before discretely shaking his head to stop that thought process in its tracks.

“I thought you read the files?” Kakashi asked. He stood in the center of the small clearing where they typically would have put their camp fire. The spot wasn’t even really a clearing, just a larger-than-usual gap between trees.

“I did.” Tenzou admitted. He scratched his cheek with his index finger. Nervous habit.

Kakashi glanced at their sleeping bags. Tenzou was standing over his, still scratching at his cheek. He always put his bag marginally closer to Kakashi’s than the other ANBU did, but Tenzou liked to pretend he wasn’t doing it intentionally.

Kakashi sat down on his bed roll and Tenzou followed suit before picking at his dry granola bar and trying to imagine it was somehow going to taste better than usual.

“Senpai,” Tenzou began, finally settling on a potential conversation topic. Kakashi groaned. A single word and he had already picked up on the fact that this was going to be a lecture. However, Tenzou noticed the stiff line of Kakashi’s shoulders relax.

“I thought that your last mission ended with a fairly severe case of chakra exhaustion,” Tenzou continued. Kakashi waved his hand. A silent dismissal.

Tenzou chose not to accept Kakashi’s signal. “And if I remember correctly, you were supposed to stay out of the field for two weeks to give yourself time to breathe. This mission puts you back on the field five days early.”

Kakashi lay down on his bed roll and started working a book out of his back pocket, which involved a significant amount of back-arching in order for him to lift his ass off the ground enough to get the book. There wasn’t exactly enough light to read, but apparently he was going to try. Tenzou swallowed and looked away.

“See,” Kakashi said as he flipped through through the book, “This is why I never tell you these things.”

“But you do tell me these things,” Yamato pointed out. “That’s how I know about it.”

“I’m fine, don’t worry about me. This mission is going to be a piece of cake.”

“Senpai, it’s going to be at least five rogue ninjas, two of whom are familiar with you and your Sharingan, so we won’t have that element of surprise. And three of them are jonin level and two chunin.”

Kakashi kept flipping through the book. “You worry too much. Besides, your jutsu is going to be a complete surprise for them. Nobody ever expects you to attack them with a fucking tree. It’s been decades since someone last had to worry about getting a log to the face in the middle of a fight.”

Tenzou snorted, then took a deep breath. The stars were somehow brighter out here in the woods, easier to see, even though there were so many branches and leaves blocking out their light. “No chidori’s, okay? They drain you too much.”

Kakashi ignored the request, which could be taken as an agreement or refusal. Tenzou decided to bank on an agreement. “I’m taking the first watch shift,” Kakashi said, “so get some sleep.”

Tenzou stood up and raised his arms above his head until his back cracked. The ANBU jacket shifted against his back, and when he glanced over his shoulder Kakashi was staring at him. His eyes were still slightly unfocused. Too tired, definitely should not be on this mission, even if Kakashi kept saying it would be a milk-run.

Tenzou kept stretching. “No, you need to rest. You sleep, I’ll take first watch.”

Kakashi began to protest, but Yamato plucked the book out of his hand and snapped it shut. “You need to sleep. You left your mandated bedrest too early, so this mission I’ll be taking as many watches as necessary. Sleep.”

Tenzou started climbing up into one of the trees as soon as he finished talking, and he could hear Kakashi grumbling below. Every few moments he glanced down from his post to see if Kakashi had laid down. The book was in Tenzou’s back pocket, a firm and uncomfortable block between himself and the tree. Within a few minutes, Kakashi curled up on his side. Something near his hand glinted in the moonlight, probably a kunai. A lot of ninja slept with weapons in their hands; their twisted concept of a security blanket, Tenzou supposed. He briefly wondered if Kakashi slept without weapons within easy reach when he was at home in his own bed.

Tenzou sighed and shifted to watch the stars some more.

 

When Tenzou finally climbed down the tree four hours later, Kakashi was still sound asleep. Usually he slept unearthly light during missions, in a constant state of half-consciousness that reminded Tenzou of the skittish doves roosting in the trees above.

“Kakashi,” Tenzou said softly, “Senpai?” Kakashi didn’t move, and based on the dark stain on his mask he seemed to be drooling in his sleep. Tenzou smiled for a second, then frowned. “You really shouldn’t be in the field right now.”

Tenzou crouched and gently pressed his left palm against Kakashi’s bare shoulder, just above his ANBU tattoo. Without waking, Kakashi pressed his warm shoulder back into the cup of Tenzou’s hand and sighed.

Immediately after that, however, he was on his feet with kunai in each hand.

“It’s me,” Tenzou said softly. “It’s your turn to watch. I didn’t want to startle you, but I guess that didn’t work.”

Kakashi dropped his kunai into his pockets and rolled his shoulders while his eye took a moment to adjust to the dark. Tenzou was still crouched on the ground, hand where Kakashi’s shoulder had approximately been.

“You sleep, I read and watch.” Kakashi held out one hand and put the other on his hip. Tenzou laughed. It was a soft laugh, not one of his deep belly-laughs that Tenzou would let out when they were within the walls of Konoha, still on guard but not quite as much, and Kakashi had just said something particularly clever.

Tenzou, a smile still ghosting across his face, stood up and pulled the book out of his back pocket.

“You still look tired though,” Tenzou said. “I can take the second shift if you need me to.”

Kakashi shook his head and sat back down on his bed roll before flipping open his book. Tenzou waited for Kakashi to say something in response, but unsurprisingly he remained silent. After a few moments, Tenzou pulled the metal frame from his face and set it down next to his bed roll. The night wasn’t cool enough for Tenzou to cover himself, so he lay on top of the bed roll, on his stomach and head to the side. Not the safest position for a ninja to sleep in, but it was his preferred method and typically how he slept if Kakashi was the one keeping watch. All his years being trained to kill his own humanity, and Danzo wasn’t able to erase the simple fact that Tenzou was a stomach-sleeper. Tenzou took a strange amount of comfort in that. 

“You’re going to fall asleep like that,” Tenzou muttered, and, without lifting his eye from the page, Kakashi reached across the distance between them to ruffle Tenzou’s hair, fingertips sliding along his skin and his hand lingering there but not as long as Tenzou would have liked.

Tenzou loosely grasped a kunai in his right hand and tucked his other hand under his chest, palm up and pressing into the zipper of his flak jacket.

 

A twig snapped and Tenzou sat up, kunai in hand. The light of dawn was seeping in through the trees, and Tenzou vaguely acknowledged that it was much later in the day than it should be. To his right, out of the corner of his eye, Tenzou could see Kakashi doubled over, book laying out before him.

Tenzou’s blood froze and his heart thrummed frantically in his chest until he saw Kakashi’s shoulders rise with a deep breath.

Asleep. Not dead, just irresponsible.

Tenzou looked away and scanned the area. There was no one he could see, but he could definitely sense a presence. Multiple presences. A leaf crunched, and Kakashi’s head jerked violently.

“You fell asleep,” Tenzou whispered. Kakashi sat up straighter, his back popping from kinks created by spending hours hunched over his book.

“I did,” Kakashi admitted. It was the type of mistake young genins made, not something typical of Kakashi.

Tenzou opened his mouth to ask Kakashi to use his sharingan to scan the area, then thought better of it. Sharingan was a huge chakra drain, especially for someone whose body wasn’t built to withstand it; someone like Kakashi.

Tenzou caught Kakashi’s eye and nodded. Simultaneously, they put their hands together and muttered “break.”

The genjutsu shattered and suddenly it became apparent that they were surrounded. Definitely more than the five rogue shinobi. Tenzou counted at least ten within his immediate field of vision.

Tenzou kept his hands together and started forming his hand signs.

“Don’t move,” one of the shinobi said, her face covered with black wrappings except for her sickly yellow eyes.. Her voice was crackly and shrill; it reminded Tenzou of the sound a dying sparrow would make after being used by a kid for shuriken target practice. 

But Yamato was already ahead of them, and the neighboring trees were sprouting new limbs that crashed down and splintered across the clearing.

Yamato took the split-second confusion to get to his feet and slam a kunai into the nearest not-Kakashi ninja before dropping to the ground to avoid a blast of some sort of raw chakra attack too fast for him to identify. A quick wooden shield from his arm protected him from what seemed to be a chakra-infused arrow. The ground slithered and shifted under Tenzou, and a quick glance down indicated someone had used an obscure transformation jutsu to turn the leaves into thousands of centipedes. That or they had a contract with centipedes. Tenzou decided not to think about it and instead got back to his feet, kunai in one hand and his other hand a shield.

Fog began to roll over Tenzou’s feet, and a quick glance towards Kakashi verified him to be the source. His sharingan was out along with his tanto, and Tenzou bit his lip before pinning someone to the ground using a massive tree trunk.

Tenzou wasn’t the biggest fan of fog-producing jutsus since he relied pretty heavily on his eyesight, but he could handle it if Kakashi thought it was necessary.

Tenzou started backing up towards Kakashi, trying to widen their combined range of attack while also narrowing their blind spot. Leaves and centipedes crunched underfoot, and Tenzou’s hair began to stand on end from the static of Kakashi’s tanto. He could feel the electricity rattling his joints and the discs of his spine.

Their backs slammed together with warm familiarity, and Tenzou fell into the groove of fighting in tandem with Kakashi. A root grew out of the ground for Kakashi to use as a launching point, and Tenzou impaled the ninjas coming for Kakashi’s back on wooden spikes from his hand.

Kakashi rolled across the leaf litter and his back settled against Tenzou’s again, only to duck in time to avoid an attack aimed for their heads. Tenzou’s reflexes weren’t fast enough though; it was an attack that, under normal circumstances, Kakashi would have blocked to protect him.

 

“Nice of you to join us,” a voice barked into his ear as Tenzou opened his eyes. Pakkun peeked down at him, wet black nose practically pressed into his eyebrow.

Tenzou sat up and the world spun. Full daylight rained down between the leaves overhead, and it was silent. The whirr of battle was gone. So was Kakashi.

Tenzou blinked. His eyes burned. “What happened? Where’s Kakashi?”

Pakkun sniffed at the dirt where Tenzou had been laying. Blood stained the dried leaves and dead centipedes. “I dunno, I only got here a few hours ago, after most the action. I’m not even sure what Kakashi wanted me to do, but here I am.”

Tenzou stood. “Hours? How long have I been out?”

Pakkun scratched at the ground. “A few hours, at least. I’m not good at math so that’s the best I got. You were out when I showed up. They thought you were dead, considering all the blood draining from your head. I stopped it, pressure on the wound, you know? Got blood on my paws now.” He kept scratching at the ground. “They took Kakashi.”

Tenzou’s mind started coming up to speed. “They took Kakashi?” He pressed the palm of his hand against his temple. Sure enough, dried blood came away. He dug a roll of gauze out of his pocket, some kunai tumbling out with it, and wrapped it around his head tight enough that hopefully the wound wouldn’t re-open.

“Well, we gotta go find him obviously,” Pakkun pointed out. “And I’ve heard you’re a decent tracker. And I’m an excellent tracker. Shouldn’t be too bad.”

Tenzou bent to pick up some stray kunai from the ground. A few of them were his, some were Kakashi’s, and there were many he could not identify. He found their packs, trampled and covered in dirt, and dumped the contents of Kakashi’s onto the ground. There wasn’t much, just some rations, a cloak, a canteen, and some books. His metal frame was half-buried under leaves, dented and stained with blood that was probably his; the frame still fit snugly on his face, though, so he decided to keep it. Tenzou consolidated everything into his own pack and slung it onto his shoulder. There wasn’t much point in bringing the bed rolls, he decided. He he buried them so at least no one would know some Leaf ninjas had been in the area. “They could have killed me, if they were smart enough to check for a pulse. And they caught Kakashi, that doesn’t happen often.”

Pakkun started walking. “Well, either you help me retrieve his stinky ass or you don’t. I was the only one he summoned, he didn’t have enough chakra left to bring the rest of us. I probably can’t stay too long either, you know how it is.”

Tenzou didn’t really know how it was, as he didn’t have a contract with anyone or anything. But he nodded and started sprinting in the same direction, going to a full run once Pakkun had picked up enough speed. Everything was still a little bright and blurry, and his feet didn’t connect with the ground with the same surety they usually did, but he wasn’t going to waste any time getting into a better fighting condition.

 

It was not exceedingly difficult to track the direction they had gone in. There were multiple lightning scars along trees, and quite a few bodies.

“I told him not to use chidori,” Tenzou mumbled as he traced a fresh fissure in the bark of the tree he was bouncing through the branches of.

“I didn’t get a count during the fight,” Tenzou called down from the trees, “do you know how many?”

Without breaking stride, Pakkun shouted back, “Didn’t get a visual count, but I can smell at least twelve still breathing.”

Tenzou counted the bodies as they slipped through the woods. Five dead, three severely wounded, too far gone to interrogate. Tenzou impaled them on spears of wood to put them out of their misery. He didn’t like watching people die a slow and painful death.

At least four he recognized from the mission file. Only one of the original five remained, and it looked like it was the kunoichi who had previously been a Leaf ninja. Tenzou hadn’t seen it in the fight, but she specialized in transportation jutsu.

Pakkun stopped at the last stand of trees before a clearing. He pointed a paw towards a small mound. “There. It seems like it’s a cave. Or, a hole in the ground I guess. Kakashi’s there, he’s still breathing. Very low on chakra but that’s not new.”

Tenzou peeked around the tree and nodded. There were two ninjas crouched on either side of the hill. One was drawing in the dirt with a stick, and the other was sharpening a blade.  
“Don’t seem too smart,” Pakkun muttered, “that’s a terrible way to keep watch.”

“Only the two of them?” Tenzou asked. Pakkun nodded. “Well, we’re lucky,” Tenzou continued “Probably would have been easy to take on if they hadn’t caught us with our pants down.”

“Why did both of you have your pants down?” Pakkun asked.

“It’s. It’s a figure of speech, Pakkun.”

Pakkun snorted and kept his eyes trained on the two ninjas keeping guard. “You lead the charge. I’m not a battle dog. But I’ll follow.”

Tenzou shook his head. “No, you stay here. If I’m not back before the sun hits noon, go to Leaf and inform the Hokage.”

“Noon? That’s too long. I could go with you and you could leave a clone here for that.”

“I can’t afford to waste chakra on that,” Tenzou said, and he dropped his pack onto the ground before phasing into the tree. Pakkun sat down and watched.

 

Tenzou was fully awake now, not fighting half-groggy and unsure of where exactly the enemy was. He slit the throat of one of the men in a single fluid move, and had slit the other’s throat before he had a chance to even notice his partner was down. Tenzou lowered their bodies so no one inside the tunnel would hear the tell-tale whump of a body hitting the ground.

Blood seeped into Tenzou’s sandals and clung to the spaces between his toes. It would be sticky when it dried, but he didn’t focus on that. Instead, Tenzou stood silently on the mound that held the entrance to the underground hide-out, and waited. Nobody emerged from the hole. With a quick glance towards Pakkun and kunai bared, Tenzou dropped into the hole.

Even in a crouch the ceiling of dirt and roots grazed the top of Tenzou’s head. He moved to all fours and stayed motionless while his eyes adjusted. He didn’t sense anything ahead in the tunnel, but he wasn’t going to take any chances.

There was a low-burning lantern on the ground a while ahead, and it illuminated the tunnel just enough to Tenzou to see the outlines of the walls and packed-down dirt floor. The ground dipped sharply downwards, going deeper and deeper into the earth.

Tenzou put his kunai in his mouth for momentary safe keeping and started to advance on all fours, the dirt imbedding itself under his fingernails and rocks digging into his palms.

When he reached the lantern, he realized that the tunnel had dipped and expanded enough that he could stand at full-height. He was now in a large circular room with wooden support beams holding the shape. He could see no other exits beyond the one where he had come. Despite the room’s size, the air was stagnant; Tenzou had brief thoughts of a dying clan and a forgotten tree with roots snaking deep into a fissure in the ground. 

Tenzou blinked the thoughts away and focused on the fact that he could sense presences beyond himself. He pressed his back against one of the wooden columns and phased into it, letting everything but his face mold with the swirls and splinters of the wood.

But still no one appeared. Finally, Tenzou looked up.

The room was tall, much taller than Tenzou had assumed. The wooden beams holding the room in shape extended upwards far beyond Tenzou’s line of sight, and small spots of light speckled the walls. The beams, Tenzou realized, were supporting the walls and providing ladders, and the lanterns marked entrances to new rooms. He was at the base of a panopticon.

Tenzou sunk deeper into the wall, focusing his acute senses on tracking down a little spark of familiar bright-blue and electric chakra; chakra that felt the way ozone smelled.

Nothing. But Tenzou held still for what seemed like hours, trying to pinpoint anything useful. Finally, he felt a glint of something at one of the rooms above him.

Tenzou pulled himself loose from the wall and dug his fingertips into the scaffolding. Pine, a good tree, Tenzou vaguely acknowledged.

And then he began to climb. Every few moments he sunk back into the wall and focused his senses on finding Kakashi, finding anything. The glinting trace of chakra in the room above him became stronger each time he paused to search it out. This chakra was quick and scintillating and difficult to focus on; Kakashi's chakra was similar, but steadier. Kakashi’s chakra didn’t feel like a frantic canary beating itself to death against the wires of its cage.   
Tenzou made his way towards the unknown chakra nonetheless. After slow and silent climbing, Tenzou reached the room and crouched on the scaffolding. He could hear voices.

“We could offer to trade him for some more of the research,” a woman said. Her voice was high and jarring. Tenzou vaguely recognized it from the fight.

“Since when has Konoha cared about hostages?” a man countered.

“You’re right, except they might make an exception for this guy. He’s one of Konoha’s most prized ninjas. I remember him from my time in Konoha, he’s a killing machine. Honestly, the only reason we got the jump on him and that sad sonofabitch he was with is because he’s sick or something,” the woman said.

“Who was that guy we killed?” another voice asked, another man.

“No clue,” the woman replied, “probably another Konoha prize, based on his wood jutsu. Jotaru is heading back right now, apparently the idiot was on such a battle high he forgot to check for a pulse.”

“That much blood loss and he’s gotta be dead,” a third man said.

“We don’t go on assumptions, and you know that. We need a confirmed kill,” a different woman offered.

Tenzou closed his eyes for a second to mentally count. Three men, two women, five total.

“Wood jutsu?” This voice was oiled and Tenzou felt goosebumps spread across his skin. He recognized this voice; it was the greasy tone of his infancy. “Hm, looks like that little experiment of mine didn’t die as early as I thought it would.”

“I’m sorry,” the first woman said, her voice suddenly stiff and louder, “If we had realized he was one of your experiments we would have put more effort into capturing--”

“No matter, I’m done with it. It bores me now. But am I correct in understanding that you’ve captured Kakashi Hatake?”

There was a moment of silence.

“Fascinating. He’s a very skilled ninja, I could perhaps replicate some of his abilities now that I have access to his DNA. I would have loved to have the chance to play with Sakumo, but his son will suffice.”

“Sir, Orochimaru sir?” the first woman began. She seemed to be the leader of the group and immediate subordinate to Orochimaru. Silence again, then she continued. “If I may ask, do you plan to kill him for your experiments?”

“Yes,” Orochimaru replied.

“If that is the case, would you mind allowing me to use him for a little experiment of my own?”

“Oh? Another scientist in my midsts?”

“No, sir, nothing near as grand as your work. I’m simply trying to expand the scope of my transportation jutsu. I would like to see if I can transport a live human. Either Kakashi will be transported alive and you can kill him yourself, or he will die during my test and then your research can start that much sooner.”

Transportation jutsu. The last rogue ninja left from the mission file was an expert in transportation jutsu, and since she had left Hidden Leaf she was already familiar with Kakashi. This was probably her. If so, her name would be Kazue.

“And why the sudden interest in testing transportation jutsu on humans?” Orochimaru asked.  
“Well, sir, I was hoping that if I could successfully transport a human using transportation jutsu, I would be one step closer to recreating the teleportation jutsu originally practiced by the second and fourth Hokages. Not to mention testing the limits of combining transportation and medical jutsus for organ transplants.”

“Hm, a simple goal, and I can see why it would intrigue you. But yes, I will allow it. Go now and experiment to your heart’s desire.”

“Yes sir.”

There was a scraping of chairs and Tenzou wove the signs necessary to conceal himself in dirt and blend with the wall.

A second later, Kazue--Tenzou recognized her sickly yellow eyes--jumped down onto the wooden beam Tenzou had been crouched on moments before. She dropped down a few more beams and began making her way to the other side of the vertical tunnel through a series of sure jumps. When she picked a doorway--or, rather, hole in the wall--and entered, Tenzou started to move.

He took a different route than her, focusing mostly on which beams would help block him from sight if anyone happened to look out of the room she had originally been in and where Orochimaru still was.

Tenzou reached the room presumably holding Kakashi and perched on a beam above the entrance. Again he melded with the dirt wall behind him and took the opportunity to focus on finding Kakashi’s chakra.

It wasn’t there. But there were two other people in the room. One of them was Kazue, and the other was someone Tenzou didn’t immediately recognize. Their chakra was hard but existed in ropey strands. It reminded Tenzou of Anko’s chakra, and for a brief moment he wondered if she’d defected.

“What are you doing here?” a man asked.

“I’m here to do some experiments on our guest, and I would appreciate it if you left,” Kazue replied.

“Experiments? Did you get Orochimaru’s permission?”

“But of course, Kabuto. Now, please leave. I don’t need you in my way.”

“Orochimaru will hear about your insubordination.”

“Not all of us are at Orochimaru’s beck and call like you are, Kabuto. And not all of us bend right over for him.”

“That’s uncalled for.”

“That’s true. Now get out of here so mama can get some work done.” There was a sound of cracking knuckles and a second later the man, Kabuto, appeared at the opening of the room.

“Why did he have to invite others in?” Kabuto mumbled to himself. Tenzou stayed completely motionless and focused on suppressing any trace of his chakra.

After another second, Kabuto jumped down and disappeared into the darkness below.

 

Tenzou peeled himself away from the wall and dropped onto a lower wooden beam that placed him next to the opening to the room. Then he took a breath and inched forward until he could peek around the corner.

After a moment of staring into darkness, a lantern lit. Tenzou blinked at the sudden light, and then his eyes adjusted. The room was small, dug out of dirt like the rest of this hide-out. There were wooden columns holding the ceiling, and a small table sat to the side. It held a lantern, and next to it Kazue was waving out a match.

Beyond her, nearly completely blocked by Kazue, was Kakashi. Tenzou could recognize him from the mop of grey hair bowed forward. He was on his knees, and appeared tied to one of the columns. His shoulders and head bobbed with slow, shallow breaths. Alive. Tenzou still couldn’t sense any traces of his chakra, though. He chewed at the inside of his mouth.

“Hatake, Hatake, Hatake,” Kazue said. She continued waving the match in the air although it had long been extinguished. “You have really lost your edge. How old are you? 23? 24? Much too young to be needing naps on missions, although you are reaching the end of your life expectancy for Konoha ninjas.”

She took a step forward, and Tenzou shifted for firmer footing.

“Sorry to see you in a state like this, I competed with you so much when we were chunin. You didn’t realize it, of course, because you were leagues ahead of me. But look who’s top dog now.”

Tenzou grimaced at the bad joke.

“And now let’s get that silly mask off and see if you’re actually as ugly as I always suspected.” Kazue stepped closer and reached out a hand, and Tenzou dug his fingers into the dirt wall before swinging into the room.

His landing wasn’t as quiet as he had intended, and Kazue immediately turned to face him.  
Her yellow eyes were unblinking and unnerving. 

“Intruder!” she began to yell, but before she finished getting the word out Tenzou had slammed together his hands and wove the seals necessary to cover her in a dome of wood. Immediately Tenzou could hear her cursing and kicking at the wood, then the hollow clunking of metal chipping away at wood.

Tenzou ran to Kakashi and pressed a hand to the fabric on his neck. There was a pulse, strong and steady. Tenzou put his hands together and tried to break the genjutsu Kakashi was under, but there was none. He was simply unconscious.

The knots tying Kakashi to the wooden column were complicated and best dealt with using a kunai, but Tenzou didn’t want to bring a blade that close to Kakashi’s wrists so he tugged and picked at them with his fingers. Kazue was still fighting her way out of the wooden dome, and there were crashes and rustling outside the room.

Tenzou took a breath and slammed the back of his arm into the wooden column, splintering it enough that he could lift Kakashi. His arms hands were still tied, and he was still unconscious, but at least he wasn’t on the column anymore. He felt small in Tenzou’s arms, something weak and vulnerable.

Tenzou couldn’t negotiate Kakashi onto his back with his hands tied, so he had to hold him against his chest. One of Kazue’s arms was poking out of the wooden dome, broken and jagged nails digging into the wood, and Tenzou could hear footsteps on wooden beams outside.

For a single moment Tenzou thanked his ability to do some jutsus without hand signs, and with Kakashi pressed to his chest, turned the entire room into a rolling wave of upward-rising dirt.

The sunlight was too bright, and Tenzou blinked the dust from his eyelashes. He was crouched in the woods, soil upturned and trees uprooted everywhere around him, and nowhere near the clearing where he had entered the hide-out and where Pakkun was waiting.

Kakashi shifted in Tenzou’s lap and rolled onto the ground. His hair was brown from the dirt, and a small cloud of dust appeared with every movement. His wrists strained at the rope, and he shifted onto his side, back to Yamato.

He coughed and his entire body shook. Tenzou pressed his hand to the space between his shoulderblades. He could feel the nobs of Kakashi’s spine against his palm.

“It’s me,” Tenzou said, “I got you. You’re safe now. Mostly. They’ll be after us in a second. We need to get moving.”

Kakashi looked over his shoulder at Tenzou. His headband was still pulled up to reveal his sharingan, and the blood-red eye focused on Tenzou’s face.

Then the eye closed and Kakashi’s back heaved with a deep cough.

“Hold still and let me cut these knots,” Tenzou said. Kakashi said nothing in response, but his entire body froze while Tenzou slipped a kunai between his wrists and gently sliced the ropes.

As the frayed ends fell away, Kakashi began rolling his wrists and stretching his fingers. His gloves were gone, Tenzou realized after a moment. Who ever tied him up wasn’t a complete idiot; it was always easier to get out of bonds when there are gloves to keep the fibers from biting into your skin.

“Can you stand?” Tenzou asked. Kakashi took a deep breath and pressed the palm of his hand to the ground. His body shifted and back arched, but his legs shook and he collapsed.

“I’ve got you,” Tenzou said. He sat down, back to Kakashi, and motioned towards his shoulders. “Can you at least sit up enough to get on?”

Tenzou could hear Kakashi shifting behind him, and then warmth against his back and arms on his shoulders. Tenzou reached back to hold Kakashi’s thighs and slowly stood up.

“Thank you,” Kakashi mumbled into Tenzou’s ear, and then his body relaxed and he passed out again.

“You’re never going out on a mission with chakra exhaustion again,” Tenzou said, and Kakashi only shifted so his forehead pressed into the crook of Tenzou’s neck.

Tenzou closed his eyes for a moment and tried to mentally calculate where Pakkun, and the entrance to the cavern, would be. He wasn’t sure how thoroughly he had collapsed their hideout, but any survivors--and there definitely would be some, especially considering how his wooden dome containing Kazue effectively became a shield for her--would either be digging their ways out under his feet or come out through the original opening. Thinking back on the directions he had moved through the tunnel, Tenzou reoriented himself and took off at a run.

 

Pakkun met them a few kilometers before they reached the place where Tenzou had initially left him. The strap of Tenzou’s pack was clenched between Pakkun’s teeth and the pack itself trailed behind him, leaving clear drag marks in the forest litter.

Pakkun dropped the strap and stretched his jaw for a moment before speaking. “Well, if he made it out alive, I guess I’ll head back. Good thing too, since my time is going to be up any moment now.” He sat back and scratched at his ear with his hind leg. His front paws were still stained with Tenzou’s blood. “You’ve got some heading after you. They came up out of that hole you went in through. But based on their movements I don’t think they’re particularly good trackers. Find a decent place to hide and lay low, that’s my recommendation.”

Tenzou nodded and briefly leaned against a tree, careful not to pinch any of Kakashi’s limbs against the bark. “Orochimaru with them?”

“I don’t think I know him. But there wasn’t anybody strong, no. I watched them all come up out of the hole, they were just a bunch of low-rankers by the looks of it. You could take them on if it wasn’t for that lump on your back.” Pakkun gestured a paw at Kakashi, who continued to breathe against Tenzou’s neck, the warmth of his breath seeping in between the fibers of Tenzou’s shirt.

Tenzou nodded, and Pakkun disappeared into a puff of smoke.

 

It took more precious moments than Tenzou would have liked to set Kakashi back down, dig the map out of the pack, and track down a safe place to, as Pakkun had suggested, lay low.

It turned out the giant hollow tree, home of the Iburi clan and where Kakashi and Tenzou first became friends, was nearby. Well, not friends, but at least spoke to each other.

It would be abandoned. Yukimi had left and everyone else was dead. As long as Orochimaru himself wasn’t coming after them, it should be a safe place.

Tenzou put the pack on and picked up Kakashi, this time carrying him with one arm hooked under his knees and the other around his shoulders. Kakashi’s head lulled forward and his chin dug into his collarbones. Carrying Kakashi on his back would have been less awkward, but with Kakashi completely unconscious it would be nearly impossible to negotiate. And Tenzou wasn’t sure how much time they had to spare.

The woods were suddenly ten times more difficult to navigate with Kakashi in his arms. The man was lightweight and gangly, built for lightning and speed, but he still slowed Tenzou down. The tree that should have been just thirty minutes away suddenly took two hours to reach.

 

The tree was so much smaller than Tenzou had remembered it; as a ten year old, it had loomed above him and above the horizon. He glanced down at Kakashi in his arms. Kakashi had been a giant to him at that time as well; now Kakashi was barely any taller than him.

The hollow trunk gave way to a cave system, as Tenzou had remembered, with the cave walls covered with the roots of the ancient tree. Tenzou’s arms were beginning to burn with Kakashi’s dead weight, but still Tenzou pushed forward. He made each step as light as possible, and stuck to the hardest patches of earth. The dirt was covered with years-old footprints from the Iburi clan; the air was too stale to stir up any dust. But Tenzou still couldn’t afford to leave any fresh tracks.

When Tenzou reached one of the entrances to the cracked and hollowed root Yukimi had led him and Kakashi through, he realized it was much, much too small for them now. Tenzou’s shoulders had broadened with the years, more so than he had consciously realized.

However, the wall opposite Yukimi’s tunnel showed promise. The wall suddenly bowed outward, and the tunnel noticeably widened for a few feet before narrowing back down again.

Tenzou set Kakashi and the pack down against the wall and wove careful hand signs to seal them off. The wood needed to look weathered, like it was starting to show the early signs of decay, and needed to be the same species of oak as the rest of the tree. Most ninjas didn’t have a good eye for signs of recent wood release jutsu, but Tenzou wasn’t one for sloppy work.

Only once the wooden wall was completed did Tenzou allow his shoulders to slump. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, then two, then three.

The space was small, only a few feet wide and fewer feet across. Pitch black as well, but the wooden wall was thick enough that a lantern wouldn’t be visible. Tenzou crouched and reached out in search of his pack.

His fingertips grazed against the rough rock wall, and then he felt firm and warm skin. Kakashi’s shoulder.

“Trying to get fresh with me?” Kakashi asked. His voice was uneven and the words drawn-out. He almost sounded drunk. “I’ll have you know, I’m a very cheap date.” 

Tenzou pulled his hand away. “I was looking for my pack,” Tenzou clarified.

“Mmm, you were close. I’m leaning on it. It’s right below the shoulder you were feeling up.”

“I was not-- fine.” Tenzou reached his hand out again and found Kakashi’s shoulder again. Still warm. He traced his fingers downwards until he found the fabric that held Kakashi’s metal arm-shields in place. Then he found the crook of Kakashi’s elbow, and beyond that the rough burlap of his pack.

“Find it?” Kakashi asked.

Tenzou didn’t answer, and instead dug through his pack until he found the lantern. He lit it, and the first thing he saw was Kakashi’s masked face.

Tenzou hadn’t gotten a very good look at Kakashi earlier, as his face was mostly covered with blood and his messy mop of grey hair. But Kakashi had pushed his hair back into place and Tenzou could see that the blood was all his.

“That’s a broken nose,” Tenzou said. Kakashi nodded slowly.

Now that he could see what he was doing, Tenzou dug out one of the canteens and a rag. He shifted so he was sitting on the ground next to Kakashi, his knees bumping into Kakashi’s thigh. He dumped water onto the rag and held it out.

However, Kakashi didn’t move to take it. Tenzou glanced down at his arms. “That arm’s broken, isn’t it?”

“Bingo,” Kakashi mumbled. When his other, presumably non-broken arm didn’t even shift, Tenzou began to wipe the exposed sections of Kakashi’s face himself.

“They beat you to hell,” Tenzou said.

“Yeah, they did. They thought they’d killed you, which made them pretty excited.”

“I’m hard to kill,” Tenzou assured him. Kakashi closed the regular eye for a moment and let Tenzou wipe blood from his eyebrow.

Kakashi’s mask was bloodstained and ripped. With the blood and dirt wiped away, Tenzou realized more than just his mask was torn; his face had been slashed.

“I’ve got to take off your mask,” Tenzou said softly. Kakashi shrugged, and Tenzou turned to dig out his small medic pack. He wasn’t a medical ninja, not by a long shot, but ANBU operatives always carried some medical supplies when they went into the field, and they were mostly trained how to use them. Tenzou carefully set out the sterilizing rinse, antibiotic cream, and bandages.

“I’ve got to take off your mask,” Tenzou repeated. Kakashi shrugged again. The closest thing to permission Tenzou was going to get.

Tenzou could feel his back tense and his shoulder stiffen. He hadn’t wanted the first time he saw Kakashi’s face to be like this.

Tenzou took a breath, then gently hooked his fingertips under the hem of the mask on either side of Kakashi’s swollen nose, just above his lips, and began to tug down. Kakashi’s open eye was red-rimmed and bleary, but focused on Tenzou’s face. Tenzou looked everywhere except the skin revealed by the mask that was now bunched up under Kakashi’s chin.

Tenzou closed his eyes for the brief second it took to look back to the set out medical supplies, and he began to wash his hands with the sterilizing rinse.

“A wound this shallow doesn’t need that intense of attention,” Kakashi said, but Tenzou didn’t reply and kept rubbing his hands together. Tenzou had never noticed Kakashi’s voice being obstructed by the mask, but somehow it sounded clearer and lighter now.

“Your hands are quite clean at this point,” Kakashi pointed out. Tenzou nodded and picked the rinse back up. He looked up at Kakashi, but kept his vision trained on Kakashi’s one open eye.

“Are you going to try and clean the wound without even looking at it?”

Tenzou said nothing and glanced back down at the bottle.

“It’s okay, Tenzou, you can look at my face,” Kakashi said.

Tenzou swallowed. “I just feel like it’s an invasion of privacy, of sorts.”

“It’s not an invasion of privacy if I give you permission.” His voice was still rough and his words slow, but Tenzou could hear the smile in Kakashi’s voice, and finally looked up to see the smile itself.

It was a good smile, Tenzou decided immediately. Crooked, with the side bearing the wound sagging a bit. Kakashi’s lips were chapped, and his jawline was smooth.

After blinking a few times, Tenzou straightened up to pour the rinse onto Kakashi’s wound. Kakashi leaned forwards and let the rinse roll off his face and onto the small patch of earth between them.

Kakashi’s breath smelled awful, and it was puffing warm against Tenzou’s face.

Tenzou fumbled with the antibiotic cream before managing to squirt some onto his finger. Kakashi slowly tilted his head to the side to give Tenzou easier access, and Tenzou spread the cream across his cheek. He could feel Kakashi’s eye on him, but he stayed focused on covering the wound with an even spread of the cream. Without looking away, Tenzou picked up the bandage and pressed it to Kakashi’s cheek, rubbing down the adhesive edges with his thumb.

“Thank you,” Kakashi said. He leaned back against the wall.

“You’ve treated my wounds before,” Tenzou reminded him. He began to fit everything back into his medic kit, rearranging half the contents so the lid snapped closed nicely.

“I mean thank you for coming to get me. I couldn’t have gotten out of that on my own.”

Tenzou blinked at the kit but couldn’t find words to say.

“I could have gotten you killed,” Kakashi continued. Tenzou could hear Kakashi shift. “I thought I had.”

“It’s okay,” Tenzou finally said. He lifted the kit with both hands and nestled it into his pack.

“No, it’s not okay,” Kakashi said. Tenzou looked up from his pack, preparing to lecture Kakashi about how he should never do anything like this again. However, Kakashi’s face was close again, their foreheads almost touching.

Kakashi’s breath was warm against Tenzou’s lips, and Kakashi’s uninjured hand pressed against the side of Tenzou’s face, thumb tucked up against the last patch of skin before the metal frame Tenzou wore around his face. After a moment of silence Kakashi’s fingers dipped into Tenzou’s hair, so Tenzou leaned forward, closed his eyes, and kissed Kakashi.

 

The kiss was messy, a factor amplified by Kakashi’s fatigue and Tenzou’s inexperience regarding what to do with his mouth. Kakashi tasted bitter and his teeth clinked against Tenzou’s. Tenzou had just started figuring out a rhythm when Kakashi pulled away.

Tenzou needed a few moments before he could open his eyes again. Kakashi rested his forehead on Tenzou’s shoulder and his chest rose and fell with deep breaths.

“I’m gonna pass out again,” Kakashi said. Tenzou shifted his weight so his legs wouldn’t cramp and wrapped his arms around Kakashi, careful to avoid jostling his broken arm.

“How about instead of passing out you go to sleep,” Tenzou offered.

“Same thing in my book, and I’m gonna pass out so hard right now.”

“I’ve got you,” Tenzou muttered, and he pressed his cheek against Kakashi’s mess of dirty grey hair.

Kakashi’s breathing slowed and evened out as Tenzou gently ran his palm up and down Kakashi’s back.

 

Tenzou wasn’t sure exactly how long they stayed in the hollow tree. The sky was dark when they emerged, Kakashi unsteady on his feet and Tenzou’s arm around his shoulder for support.

There was no sign anyone had come through the area except for them, and Tenzou decided it was time for them to make a run for Konoha.

Well, jog. With Kakashi on his back, Tenzou was too weighted-down for a full sprint. Still, they were making good time, and at least Kakashi was mostly awake and alert.

“So, how did the mission go?” Kakashi mumbled into Tenzou’s ear. His arms were loosely wrapped around Tenzou’s neck and thighs pressed into Tenzou’s hips.

“Um. Well, I got a lot of important intel,” Tenzou admitted. He shifted his grip on Kakashi’s legs.

“Didn’t get the scroll?”

“No.”

“Hm.”

“But I did confirm that Orochimaru was working with those rogue ninjas, and only one of the original targets is still alive.”

“Orochimaru, hm? Which one’s still alive?”

“Kazue. She’s the defected Konoha ninja, expert in transportation jutsu. She wanted to use you for an experiment to transport humans, or something. Orochimaru wanted to use your genetics for experiments too.”

“Mmm, everybody wants my body these days.”

Tenzou hid his laugh in a cough. “Well, you’re in high demand.”

“Damn right.” Kakashi tucked his face into the crook of Tenzou’s neck for the umpteenth time and fell asleep. If Tenzou closed his eyes and focused, he could feel the traces of Kakashi’s chakra, folded in on itself with slow electrical pulses. Usually Kakashi’s chakra had a stronger crackle to it, and a threat of shock if anyone got too close. The symptoms of catastrophic chakra exhaustion, Tenzou supposed. He adjusted his grip on Kakashi’s legs again and started jogging a little slower, so Kakashi wouldn’t be jostled awake again.

 

“She’s going to yell at me,” Kakashi mumbled against the fabric of Tenzou’s shirt as they neared the gates.

“I didn’t realize you were awake. Who is she?”

“Rin.”

It was early dawn and the gates were wide open. Kotetsu and Izumo were at their desk, Kotetsu sleeping against Izumo and Izumo reading the newspaper. Izumo waved at them wordlessly, and Tenzou nodded in return. Then he began to make his way to the hospital.

“Who’s Rin?” Tenzou asked.

“Mmm, old team mate. She’s one of the main doctors at the hospital now.”

“She left the field?”

Kakashi didn’t answer and instead shifted against Tenzou’s back. He could feel Kakashi’s warm breath seep through the fabric at the nape of his neck.

When Tenzou stepped into the hospital’s waiting room, there was already a short woman waiting for them. She had purple clan markings arching up from her jaw to just an inch or so below her eyes. She wore a doctor’s white coat and tapped her heels against the tile with more force than necessary.

“Are you Rin?” Tenzou asked. He could feel Kakashi shift on his back. “How did you know we were coming?”

“Kotetsu sent word.”

“Lies,” Kakashi mumbled, “He was dead asleep when we passed them.”

“Hatake,” Rin began. Her voice was sharp and biting. Kakashi shifted again. “You left on a mission despite my explicit instructions to not, and look at where it got you. You’re covered in blood, probably yours--” Tenzou nodded because it was, indeed, Kakashi’s own blood, “--and you’ve got this poor guy carrying your sorry ass home.”

Tenzou nodded again.

Rin’s face softened and she smiled at Tenzou. “Do you mind carrying him a bit further? I’m afraid all the stretchers and wheelchairs are more comfortable than he deserves. I’ve already got a room set up down the hall.”

Without waiting for his reply, she turned and began to walk down the hall, each click of her heels echoing against the sterile walls. Tenzou sighed, then followed.

Rin was already setting up IV fluids when Tenzou stepped into the room. It was a private room, with windows that opened onto a good view of the trees and flowering bushes outside. A few red finches were bouncing around in the plants, but the windows were too thick to hear their chirping.

“My favorite room, so nice of you,” Kakashi said as Tenzou deposited him onto the bed. He landed on his ass gracelessly, and Tenzou could feel Kakashi watching as he stood up straight for the first time in hours and cracked his back.

Tenzou started doing shoulder stretches and watched Kakashi gingerly pull off his arm-guards so Rin could insert the IVs. Tenzou could still feel the remnants of Kakashi’s warmth and the pressure of his body against his his back, but the stretches were helping the lingering sensations fade. Tenzou kept stretching.

“Is your arm broken?” Rin asked as she took Kakashi’s arm and watched him wince.

“Yeah.”

Rin groaned before reaching up to peel Kakashi’s mask down. As her fingers hooked the fabric, she glanced over her shoulder at Tenzou. “You can leave now, thank you for bringing him in. You’re a better friend than he deserves.”

Kakashi waved his good hand. “No, he can stay, it’s fine.”

Rin furrowed her eyebrows before looking back at Kakashi.

“He’s seen my face, it’s no big deal. We actually made out a little while I was half-conscious, it was pretty good,” Kakashi explained.

“Why are you telling me this?” Rin asked.

At the same time, Tenzou said, “why are you telling her this?”

Rin and Tenzou nodded at each other, then both shifted to look at Kakashi, who was busy digging into one of his pockets with considerable difficulty. He held up a key. “Tenzou, can you water my plant for me? Rin’s not going to let me leave for a few weeks, I’m guessing.”

Rin put her hands on her hips and nodded. Tenzou took the key, then scratched his head for a moment. “Alright. Um. I’ll be going then.”

Rin smiled at him again. “It was nice meeting you.”

Tenzou nodded. As soon as he shut the door, Tenzou could hear Rin ask, “Why did you tell me you kissed him? You never tell me about kisses, only about your weird hook-ups.”

Presumably, Kakashi shrugged in response.

 

As an ANBU captain, Kakashi was one of the few ANBU ninjas given his own private quarters. Tenzou was slightly jealous as he fit the key into Kakashi’s door. He had to share a room with three other ANBU members, and before that, he had stayed in the barracks: a long hall full of bunk beds and no semblance of privacy.

Kakashi had as much privacy as he wanted, though.

His room was about as large as the one Tenzou shared, with a decent-sized unmade bed pressed into the corner and a small kitchenette opposite it. No bathroom, which explained why Tenzou frequently found Kakashi taking a shower at odd hours of the night. Under the only window in the room was a small table with two chairs. The table’s wooden surface was completely hidden from view by piles and piles of mission reports and ANBU files. They were classified things Tenzou shouldn’t be anywhere near; Kakashi was either careless, or trusted him. Tenzou wasn’t sure which option was right, but he knew which one he was hoping for. He lay his palm on one of the piles for a second, then turned his gaze to the small plant sitting on the window sill.

The plant was probably supposed to be a bonsai, Tenzou decided, but lack of consistent trimming had let the miniaturized tree run wild. It was a maple, and its leaves were already wilting from lack of water. All of Kakashi’s dishes were dirty and piled in the kitchen sink and across the small counter, so Tenzou had to settle for a glass that looked slightly cleaner than the rest to water the plant with. The soil was dry and it absorbed the water readily.

Then, without investigating Kakashi’s room any further, Tenzou left.

 

Five days and one short mission later, Tenzou decided that the tree needed watered again. The dishes had not miraculously washed themselves, so Tenzou also took a moment to do Kakashi that favor.

He only owned a few plates, bowls, and cups, so it didn’t take long. Most of the cupboards were completely empty except for some packages of ramen, so Tenzou picked a random shelf for the dishes and hoped he was at least close. The fridge was full of take-out, so he carefully popped open the lid of each one and sorted out the ones that had gone bad or at least looked questionable. Then, he took out the trash.

Because he still hadn’t actually watered the plant, Tenzou returned to Kakashi’s room after a quick trip to the dumpster. The plant looked fine, but Tenzou was fairly certain it would be happier with water from a clean glass.

The table chairs were covered in mission files, just like the table itself, so Tenzou had nowhere to sit. He settled himself on the floor at the foot of Kakashi’s bed, and finally took the opportunity to take in Kakashi’s room in full.

Tenzou knew Kakashi was a fairly avid reader, but he hadn’t expected so many books. Kakashi’s walls were lined with four bookcases brimming with books; the books were piled haphazardly, some on their sides, others in messy piles that were sure to snap their spines. There didn’t seem to be any significant organization. There were more books spilled across the foot of Kakashi’s bed, titles caught up in the twisted sheets. Tenzou stood and carefully extracted the books in danger of ripped pages and set them down in a pile.

There was another stack of books on the nightstand, and when Tenzou picked up the top title to read its back cover, he noticed two picture frames hidden by the books.

The first picture was of a man holding a child. The boy was just a toddler, turned away from the camera and his face buried into the man’s shirt. His hands gripped the shirt and Tenzou grinned. From the mess of grey hair, he was positive it was Kakashi. The man holding him was smiling, his soft eyes fixated on the child in his arms. He had grey hair too, messier than Kakashi’s, tied back into a ponytail.

Tenzou lifted the frame and turned it around to read the back of the photograph. “Hatake Clan: Sakumo “White Fang” and Son, Kakashi.”

Tenzou didn’t recognize the writing.

The other frame had a picture of Kakashi, about eleven years old and already covering the bottom half of his face with a mask, and two other children his age. Behind them stood a man with bright blond hair. Fourth Hokage Minato Namikaze. Kakashi didn’t have his left eye covered, Tenzou realized, and there was no scar. He didn’t have his Sharingan yet. Just two regular eyes, but they were darker and hollower than the should have been for a child.

Tenzou recognized the girl standing next to Kakashi immediately from her clan markings: purple, arching up her cheeks. Rin. She had a good smile, showing all her teeth. Her arms were hooked around Kakashi and the other child, the only one in the picture Tenzou didn’t recognize.

The third child was a boy, wearing orange goggles over his eyes. He smiled, watching Rin out of the corner of his eye. He had a good smile too, like Rin. Even with the mask over his face, Tenzou could tell Kakashi was not smiling.

Tenzou set the photograph down without reading the back and left, locking the door behind himself. He stood outside the door for a moment, on the welcome mat covered in dog prints, then pressed his back to the door and slid down so he was sitting on the floor.

The welcome mat’s sharp bristles, meant for shoes and not asses, was not particularly comfortable. Tenzou covered his face in his hands and tried to keep from thinking about how wonderful kissing Kakashi had been, and how somehow his calloused fingers had felt so soft against the side of Tenzou’s face.


	2. Chapter 2

When Tenzou received his next mission file two weeks later, he was surprised to see his team roster: Kakashi, back on duty, and two raw ANBU recruits.

The first was a girl named Miwa. She had only recently joined ANBU, and this would be her third mission. However, she already had seventeen kills and no significant hospitalizations. She was fifteen and only made jonin two weeks prior. She was from a small offshoot family of the Sarutobi clan. Not unlike her distant uncle Asuma, she seemed to have an affinity towards chakra-bladed weapons.

The second new recruit was a young girl named Shiori. For a long moment after looking at her photo in the file, Tenzou felt his chest tighten. She was only ten. Too young. She already had four kills. Too young.

They met at the front gates at dawn, everyone wearing their masks but easily enough identified by height alone.

Kakashi was slouching as usual, but Tenzou could tell from the tense lines in his arms that he was fully recovered. The rosy sunlight reflected off Kakashi’s unkempt mess of grey hair and it took conscious effort for Tenzou to look away.

After a few strained moments of silence, which Tenzou spent sizing up the new ANBU recruits, Kakashi put his hands on his hips, and cleared his throat.

However, the taller of the two young girls, presumably Miwa, spoke first. “We’re going to travel in reverse-triangle formation. I will be at center, you two,” she motioned at Kakashi and Tenzou, “will be on either side. You,” she jabbed a finger at Shiori, “stay behind me at all times.”

Kakashi cleared his throat a second time. “No,” he said simply.

“Excuse me?” Miwa asked.

“No,” Kakashi repeated before continuing, “that formation leaves Shiori open to attack from behind. We’re traveling in standard three-person escort triangle formation. I will be at the front, Shiori behind me, and you and Tenzou to either side of her.”

Miwa crossed her arms. Tenzou noticed that she wore metal knuckles on her hands, each made with spiked tips of chakra metal.

Before Miwa could respond, Tenzou decided to end the powerplay. “Captain’s orders. Let’s go.”

 

Miwa chose the formation spot on Kakashi’s left side and Tenzou didn’t fight her. Strategically, it didn’t make much of a difference, and personally, Tenzou preferred to stay on the side of Kakashi’s uncovered eye.

“We need to detour left to avoid the gorge up ahead,” Miwa offered. Tenzou could see Kakashi’s shoulders tense.

“No, we continue ahead,” Kakashi replied.

Tenzou nodded in agreement. Although it was very unlikely they were being followed, having just left the village, it was best to avoid predictable detours.

Miwa groaned but continued racing through the trees, keeping to formation for the most part. Shiori said nothing.

 

“Did you read her file?” Tenzou asked Kakashi. They were taking a bathroom break, and the girls were both peeing in the bushes. Tenzou and Kakashi were pissing against neighboring trees, and Tenzou kept his gaze focused on the leaves above. Even though autumn chills were beginning to trail in the wind, the leaves were still green. Only a handful of them were beginning to turn.

“Yes. And I got additional information you didn’t.”

Tenzou nodded, expecting the conversation to end there, but Kakashi continued, “She’s had considerable issues following orders since her genin squad, which I doubt is unexpected information at this point. She was allowed entrance to ANBU due to her prowess at genjutsu and chakra-blades, but she is still a liability. Yugao and I have decided to keep her on lower-ranking missions and to keep her with people who have a strong sense of authority, preferably one of us or someone like you.”

Tenzou nodded again. He definitely had a strong sense of authority, but Tenzou could feel the corners of his mouth twitch with a grin at the thought that Kakashi would trust him as Miwa’s wrangler. 

“What about Shiori?” Tenzou asked after a moment.

“She’s got no outstanding talents other than a sharp mind, prodigious memory, and excellent stealth and observation skills. The files implied she’s got a kekkei genkai, although it didn’t elaborate as to what. More medical knowledge than either of us, but just barely. She’s mastered all the basics and is enough of a blank slate that she’ll be able to believably blend in as a Frost orphan. A fair amount of her file was redacted, so she’s being used for something beyond both our pay grades.”

Tenzou nodded again, and before he could come up with anything else to talk about Miwa and Shiori emerged from the bushes, and Miwa was lecturing Shiori on how to select leaves to wipe with. Shiori, however, was focused more on the skylarks darting between the branches above.

 

They camped a few kilometers from the border between Land of Fire and Land of Hot Water. It was fairly close, Tenzou realized, to the old hollow tree where he and Kakashi had found refuge during their last mission together. Where they had kissed.

Tenzou ducked his head so no one would see his blush (despite the fact that he was still wearing his ANBU mask) and finished laying out his bedroll. Kakashi was only arm’s length away, laying out his own roll.

“Let’s see, what else do you need to know?” Miwa asked herself aloud. She and Shiori were laying out their bedrolls on the other side of the now-extinguished fire. Shiori’s bedroll was so much smaller than everyone else’s; it was still genin-issue. Tenzou’s chest tightened again.

“Need to know about what?” Tenzou asked to distract himself. Kakashi sprawled out on his bedroll and started flipping through a book. The cover had a sinewy naked man stretched out on what looked like a park bench. There was an out-of-focus flower in the foreground for convenient and attractive censorship.

Miwa drew Tenzou’s attention away from the book. “Shiori’s going to be going into the unknown for who knows how long. I’m trying to give her all the advice she’s going to need.”

“Always clean your kunai,” Kakashi offered, “blood can rust the blade.”

Tenzou sat back on his heels and looked at Miwa and Shiori through the last tendrils of smoke arching up from the fire pit; his first good look at their faces beyond their shoddy photographs in the mission file. Miwa had her mask off; she kept her hair short and tied back, out of the way of her eyes. She had a pugged up nose covered in piercings. Tenzou wasn’t quite sure what the purpose of those were and for a moment imagined how the metal hoops could be inconveniently caught on twigs or branches or kunai during a mission.

Shiori had removed her mask too. She was young, but with clever narrow eyes and long curly black hair. No clan markings; probably one of the reasons she was chosen, Tenzou reasoned. She looked fairly nondescript, and didn’t show any overt signs of being a Leaf ninja. Chances were one of her parents was a foreigner; curly hair wasn’t too common from what Tenzou knew.

Tenzou closed his eyes for a moment and focused on each of their chakra signatures in turn. Everyone had their chakra suppressed as much as possible so no nearby enemies would detect them but this close they could still be sorted out from the buzz and hum of the forest around them.

Miwa’s chakra was loose and chattery. Tenzou could feel some static, almost like Kakashi’s chakra, but he was fairly certain that Miwa’s electrical quality came from her extensive chakra-blade training. Her chakra wasn’t as sharp, either; whereas Kakashi’s chakra had spikes that said “danger, keep away,” Miwa’s felt a bit gentler. She hadn’t had as many years in the field, however. She would get there in time.

Tenzou turned his focus to Shiori’s chakra. Hers was controlled and sure where Miwa’s was haphazard. If he were to test her, she probably had an affinity for earth. After a moment, Tenzou sensed a quiet pulse to her chakra; with each inhale Shiori’s chakra became heavier and more solid, and with every exhale lighter. She was potentially vacillating between an earth and dust affinity. Interesting.

“Boys,” Miwa said, rousing Tenzou from his analysis. “Don’t trust boys.”

Tenzou opened his mouth to protest but Kakashi was already talking, eye still skimming the page the smut he was reading. “Agreed, don’t trust boys, Shiori. They’re trouble. You can trust girls, though. Be a lesbian.”

Miwa stared at Kakashi, mouth agape. Missing a few teeth, Tenzou noticed. Probably from fist-fights. From the way she acted, probably from fist-fights with fellow Leaf ninjas.

Miwa turned to face Shiori, who was fiddling with the clasps on the corner of her ANBU mask. “Be a lesbian if you want, that’s fine. But just remember that you’re undercover and you can never trust anybody completely.”

“She’s a ninja, she knows that,” Kakashi pointed out, “Trust isn’t something we do very often.”

Tenzou looked down at his hands and picked some dirt from under a fingernail. Trust was something Tenzou did readily, at least with Kakashi.

“I’ve already set up some extensive genjutsu around the camp,” Miwa announced, “So we don’t need anybody to stay up and keep watch tonight. My genjutsu will give us plenty of warning.”

Kakashi continued flipping through his book. “No, we still keep watch. Tenzou and I will take the first watches, and Shiori can take the last one.”

“Why don’t you want me to keep watch?” Miwa asked.

“You put too much faith in your genjutsu,” Tenzou said before Kakashi had a chance to answer. Kakashi nodded, and the conversation ended.

Miwa huffed before burrowing into her bedding. Shiori silently nodded to Tenzou and Kakashi, then followed suit.

“I’m not tired,” Kakashi said softly. Tenzou turned and watched Kakashi pull off his ANBU mask and set it down between them. “So I’ll take the first watch.”

Kakashi’s visible eye was bright, nothing like the last mission. So Tenzou nodded, took off his ANBU mask, and lay down on his bedroll. He pillowed his head on his arms and shifted his head to the side, so he could watch Kakashi.

Kakashi was halfway through his book. It was a title Tenzou recognized from Kakashi’s bookshelves, although he hadn’t seen the scandalous cover before. Tenzou guessed it was a collection of gay erotic fiction.

“Tenzou, you’re staring,” Kakashi said lightly. Tenzou blinked. Indeed he had been. He lifted his head and stretched one arm out so it rest in the patch of dirt between them.

“Are we okay?” Tenzou asked.

Kakashi’s eye narrowed. Tenzou was fairly sure he was frowning. He tried to clarify. “I mean, what happened during the last mission.”

Kakashi’s eye narrowed further, so Tenzou tried once more. “I mean, in the tree. When you and I…”

Tenzou’s voice intentionally trailed off, and Kakashi squinted some more, but there were little wrinkles stretching away from the corner of his eye. He was smiling. Tenzou could feel his entire body relax.

“Oh,” Kakashi said. He put his book down and looked up at the stars. Tenzou held his breath and waited for Kakashi to say sometime more, but he remained silent. Kakashi didn’t look away from the stars, and his hand inched across the ground until he found Tenzou’s. The fabric of Kakashi’s gloves was rough, but his exposed fingers were warm against the skin of Tenzou’s hand. Tenzou couldn’t flip his hand over so they were palm-to-palm, but he shifted his fingers until he found Kakashi’s thumb, and he squeezed it.

“Go to sleep, Tenzou, I’ll wake you up when it’s your turn,” Kakashi said. He didn’t move his hand. Tenzou closed his eyes and let his mind relax. They were okay.

 

Traveling through the Land of Hot Water was welcomingly uneventful. Miwa and Kakashi had only argued over who was in charge twice, and they had covered the entire span of the country in a single day. Shiori was able to keep up despite her short legs, and at times seemed to have even more stamina than Miwa. At least she never called for bathroom breaks. But then again, as Tenzou had noticed early on, she didn’t really talk.

Dusk had fallen and the stars were beginning to twinkle out between the clouds when they reached the edge of the forest. Tenzou could see his own breath fogging into the air, squeezing out from the sides of his ANBU mask. In the distance, they could see the square lights of a building window in the clearing ahead.

“I see clothes blowing on a line,” Miwa said from her perch up in the tallest tree at the edge of the woods. “I can go and see if there’s anything worth filching.”

Tenzou turned to glance at Shiori, who was sitting on a low branch of a neighboring tree and reading a local Frost newspaper she had found blowing in the wind earlier. She was still wearing her Leaf clothes, and if she was going to blend in she needed some Frost clothing. Additionally, it was cold. She was already swaddled up in her mission cloak.

“We decided to wait until we got closer to an actual village to do that,” Kakashi replied He was crouched on the ground in the snow next to Tenzou, and his fingers were twitching. Tenzou bit back the urge to tell him not to use his sharingan.

“But this is the perfect opportunity to grab some clothes. I’m going to at least go check and see if there’s anything that could fit Shiori.”

“No, you’re not,” Kakashi said. “You’re going to keep first watch, and you’re going to stay within this immediate area. Frost’s military power is unknown, so that’s why we’re sticking to the plan.”

Miwa kicked the trunk of the tree she was in and snow showered down on Kakashi and Tenzou.

 

The tree Tenzou decided to sleep against wasn’t exactly warm. The cold still seeped into his bones even with his cloak wrapped around him. However, when Kakashi sat down next to him and pressed his shoulder against Tenzou’s, Tenzou decided that the sleeping arrangements were alright.

Shiori didn’t seem to notice. She had decided to sleep in the tree next to Miwa, and Tenzou was only marginally worried that she would have a bad dream and roll off of her branch in the middle of the night.

Even with Kakashi’s warm shoulder pressed up against him, and their cloaks spread over them as blankets, Tenzou couldn’t get to a restful sleep. He considered getting up and offering to take over Miwa’s watch, but Kakashi’s hand had found his under the cloaks and Tenzou didn’t exactly want to untangle their fingers. Every part of Tenzou was cold, except the places touching Kakashi.

Between moments of restless sleep, Tenzou’s eyes would scan the trees for Miwa’s shape.

 

A sharp pain against his shin woke Tenzou. He hadn’t been asleep long, he knew that, and he was on his feet, hand separated from Kakashi’s and kunai in his palm, within a second.

Shiori was standing next to him, her cloak around her shoulders, and it took a few moments and a few blinks for him to realize that she had kicked him awake.

As Kakashi got to his feet next to Tenzou, Shiori pointed to the tree where Miwa had been. It was empty except for a few hazy remnants of smoke. A shadow clone.

Then Shiori pointed towards the house in the clearing.

“I’m going to kill her,” Kakashi said, “Or at least put an official mark in her file for disobeying the direct orders of her captain.” He stretched, arms above his head and the hem of his shirt lifting just for a single glimpse of goosebumped cold skin--Tenzou quickly looked away--before pointing to the building in the clearing. “Let’s go,” he said, and he took off. Tenzou and Shiori followed a few paces behind, kunai out and ANBU masks on.

 

The clothes on the line appeared untouched, and they all seemed to belong to adults anyways. The snow was thin and hard enough that Miwa’s light steps hadn’t left any footprints, but Tenzou and Kakashi certainly did. Tenzou wasn’t focusing on subtlety at the moment, and he guessed that Kakashi wasn’t either. Shiori, however, was a ghost in the snow.

Kakashi stopped next to one of the lit windows and leaned against the wall. Tenzou came to stand next to him, and Shiori behind Tenzou. The three of them pressed themselves against the rough wooden wall while Kakashi lifted his headband to reveal his sharingan and glanced into the building. Tenzou let his eyes briefly shift out of focus, Kakashi turning into a soft blur of blues and greys, while he tried to find some sign of Miwa’s chakra.

A wave of crackling chakra crashed into his bones, coupled with a scream. Miwa.

Kakashi shifted away from the window and turned to look at Tenzou. “It’s not a house, it’s a military checkpoint. They’ve got Miwa. Four of the soldiers in there have swords; I do not believe they are ninjas. But there are two women who look to be ninjas.”

Tenzou hadn’t felt any traces of chakra other than Miwa’s. “Why did she scream?” he asked.

Tenzou could see Kakashi blinking at him with mismatched eyes through the holes in his mask before Kakashi glanced over his shoulder towards the window again. “They cut her fucking arm off. We have to move now, before she bleeds out. Shiori, you stay out here until we call for you.”

Tenzou nodded, and Kakashi backed up to get a running start. Then, Kakashi launched himself through the window and showered Tenzou in shards of glass that dug into his mask and imbedded in his pants as he jumped in after.

 

Kakashi had already sliced two of the sword-wielding soldiers’ throats with his kunai by the time Tenzou landed, and he had started dodging the chakra-infused punches from the two kunoichi. One of the surviving soldiers with swords held Miwa up, his arm around her neck and sword to her chest. There was blood trickling from where she had dug into his arm with her fingernails. Her other hand was gone, as well as most of that arm. In its place was a bloody ragged stump, cut off just inches above her elbow.

“Tenzou,” Miwa began, but before she could finish Tenzou had used his wood release to break open the skull of the soldier holding her.

Miwa fell to her knees and clutched the wound.

“Put pressure on it, as much as you can,” Tenzou said before jumping into Kakashi’s fight with the two kunoichi.

“The fourth soldier with the sword went into the attic,” Kakashi said before Tenzou had a chance to do anything other than deliver a solid punch to the rib cage of one of the women. “Go.”

Tenzou found the access panel and ladder, just a few feet away from Miwa, and launched himself into the attic, kunai in each hand.

The man was in the corner next to a window, and he was killed easily enough with kunai to his back, between his ribs and into his heart and lungs. It was only once the man slumped over that Tenzou saw the lantern flickering in the open window. He kicked it off the sill and watched the flame hiss and flicker and die in the snow before dropping back down to the first floor.

“He was sending a signal,” Tenzou said to Kakashi as he snapped one of the women’s neck between his hands. The other kunoichi was at his feet in a pool of blood, dead.

“Shiori, get in here and stop the bleeding,” Tenzou said. Shiori entered through the front door, clearly uninterested in the glass shards in the window frame.

“Get Miwa ready to be moved as fast as possible, we need to retreat,” Kakashi said. He pulled his headband down over his sharingan again.

“My arm. It’s over there. Get my arm,” Miwa said. The green light of medical jutsu was already glowing around her bloodied stump.

Shiori shook her head and Tenzou crouched down next to her. He could feel the heat and light of her jutsu against his arm. Light and airy, he noted, like the eye of a storm.

“You don’t know how to reattach limbs, do you?” he asked. Shiori shook her head again, black curls swinging from side to side.

Tenzou stood up, scratched his head, and started looking for Miwa’s arm. They would at least need the chakra knuckles off it.

One of Miwa’s chakra knuckles, unattached to any limb, were glinting in a dusty corner next to Kakashi. Tenzou bent to pick them up while Kakashi stood at a window, arms crossed, staring out into the night.

“There’s a village that way,” Kakashi said as Tenzou straightened back up. “That’s where they were signaling to. We need to move. Depending on how long they were signaling someone could be here any minute.”

“Do you see anyone?” Tenzou asked. He peeked over Kakashi’s shoulder into the darkness. Kakashi had lifted his headband and was using his sharingan again.

“No, not yet,” Kakashi replied, “Shiori, can Miwa be moved yet?”

Shiori shook her head, and Tenzou went back to hunting for Miwa’s other arm.

“Here they come,” Kakashi said softly. “Civilians by the looks of it. I see no weapons, and no outstanding chakra. We need to leave.”

Shiori was still working on Miwa’s arm, and she shook her head again.

“Shiori, we have to move her,” Tenzou said. “I can carry her.”

Shiori continued to shake her head.

“We can hide in here, maybe,” Tenzou offered. Kakashi turned away from the window and stared at him. His sharingan shown bright and red through the left eye socket of his mask. Tenzou cleared his throat and continued, “If it’s just civilians, then we can trick them with a false wall very easily. Unless Miwa can do some one-handed genjutsu.”

Miwa shook her head, but began to get to her feet. Tenzou took her arm and helped steady her, and Shiori carefully got to her feet with them, not ceasing her medical jutsu once.

Tenzou picked the wall by the dead kunoichi and began to guide Miwa and Shiori there. The wall didn’t have any furniture against it and there were no windows or doors. It was the best, and only, option for a false wall to hide behind.

Kakashi stepped aside from the window and scanned the room for a moment. Then he kicked the front door of the small cabin open, letting the cool draft and light snowfall drift into the room. 

“We need them to think the killers already left,” Kakashi explained, “the first of the group is already almost here.” Tenzou nodded, then patted the space on the wall next to him. The glow of Shiori’s medical jutsu was fading, but Miwa’s knees were still weak and shaking. Tenzou hooked an arm around her to hold her up. She was too young for this, too.

Tenzou used a one-handed wood release to form the wall, branches and trunks exploding out of the walls and ceilings and floors before locking together to form a wall that, unless someone investigated closely, would look just as natural as the others.

Just as the snow began to crunch outside, Tenzou realized that they had never found Miwa’s arm.

“Miwa,” he whispered, “Where do you keep your metal forehead protector?”

Miwa shifted against his side. “Wrapped around my arm. Oh, shit.” Her voice was papery and thin. Tenzou resisted the urge to pat her on the head. She was an adult, she faced the consequences of her actions. No more coddling.

“Fuck,” Kakashi whispered to Tenzou’s other side.

“Tenzou,” Miwa whispered, “Where’s Shiori?”

Footsteps sounded in the doorway, and a little girl began to cry.

“Help me, mister, please help me,” the girl begged. The wall was nearly against Tenzou’s chest, but he was able to maneuver his free hand up to the level of his eye and carefully force a small hole into the wall.

Shiori was sitting in the pool of Miwa’s blood, ANBU mask gone, pressing her hand to her side. A kunai that hadn’t been there earlier was on the floor covered in blood along one of its edges.

The man entered into Tenzou’s field of vision and he crouched next to Shiori.

“Little girl,” he asked, “what happened? Are you okay?”

Shiori pulled her hand away from her side. “They stabbed me, mister.” Her shoulders began to shake with sobs.

“Who, who did this to you? Who killed these soldiers?” the man asked.

Shiori shrugged. “I don’t know. My village,” she paused to hiccup, “my village, there was an avalanche. I was lost but I… I saw this building. And I came for help.”

Tenzou could hear more people coming to the doorway, gasping at the sight of the carnage.

“Avalanche?” the man asked, “But that was nearly a week ago. Have you been wandering all this time?”

Suddenly the quality of Shiori’s voice began to shift. It was almost imperceptible, but it made the hairs on the back of Tenzou’s neck stand on end. In the brief moment of silence, Tenzou could feel a rush of chakra with each of Shiori’s breaths, settling heavy against his skin.

“I don’t know, sir, I don’t know. I’ve just been trying to find help. All I have are my pajamas,” Shiori said. The chakra was oozing from her voice.

The clothes she was wearing were clearly not pajamas. A skirt with mesh leggings, a one-sleeved shirt with a mesh undershirt. Even a civilian would recognize these as the clothes of a ninja. And yet, Tenzou began to question that. Certainly mesh and skirts were reasonable pajamas.

“This is her kekkei genkai,” Kakashi whispered, his voice barely audible. Tenzou closed his eyes and nodded. Her voice. When she used this ability, people believed what she told them. She was perfect for this mission. It clearly worked on civilians, and his thoughts were cloudy enough that Tenzou knew she could push this skill far enough to addle the minds of seasoned jonin.

A woman came into Tenzou’s field of vision and placed a shawl around Shiori’s shoulders. “It’s okay, little one, it’s okay. You’re safe. What’s your name?”

The woman crouched down next to Shiori and pressed a hand to her shoulder.

“Shi,” Shiori choked out, “Shi.”

“And what’s your family name?” someone Tenzou couldn’t see asked.

“I…” Shiori paused to hiccup and sob a bit more, “I don’t remember. I don’t remember. I… I don’t remember.”

The woman crouched next to Shiori hushed her and pulled her into a tight hug.

“I got here,” Shiori said, her voice muffled by the woman’s embrace, “I got here, and, and these soldiers said they would help me. I have an aunt in a city up north, I remember, and they said they would take me there. But then,” Shiori took a deep breath and hiccuped a few times, “then these people came in, I don’t know who they were, but they started attacking the soldiers! I screamed and hid and that--” she pointed to the soldier whose skull Tenzou had crushed, “--that man, he shielded me. I don’t remember everything. I just, this puddle of blood, is it mine?” Shiori hugged the woman back and started sobbing again.

“Oh poor thing,” one of the women Tenzou couldn’t see said.

“It was probably those bastards from Hot Water, always trying to start trouble,” another person said.

“It’s okay sweetie, you’re safe now, we’ll do our best to get you to your auntie,” the woman holding Shiori hummed.

Tenzou leaned back against the wall and let his shoulders sag.

“Well that went better than predicted,” Kakashi mumbled, and Tenzou nodded despite the fact that nobody could see the gesture.

 

Tenzou wasn’t able to deconstruct the wall until well past dawn, when the last of the village people had finally left the place. They had taken most of the bodies with them. The signaling soldier in the attic escaped their attention; a few more hours needed to pass before his blood soaked the floorboards through and started seeping from the ceiling of the first floor. Miwa’s arm didn’t make an appearance.

With the wall down and the villagers gone, followed the sound of buzzing flies to Miwa’s arm. Under a desk and already sickly pale with shrunken veins spread across the flesh like dried riverbeds, the arm reminded Tenzou of the broken arm separated from a marble statue.

Miwa looked away and held her good hand to her stump while Tenzou removed the bloody armband holding her forehead protector and pried her chakra knuckles off the fingers. Bones cracked and snapped in the process, and Miwa vomited onto the floor. Tenzou did not flinch.

“How on earth did Shiori know about that avalanche?” Tenzou asked. He picked up Shiori’s mask from the corner where she had left it. Her headband with her forehead protector was neatly tucked inside it.

“That newspaper,” Miwa grumbled. “The one she found blowing through the woods.”

“Clever girl,” Kakashi shouted down from the attic. He was upstairs prying Tenzou’s kunai out of the guy’s back

Miwa moved to the doorway and stood there, looking out onto the early morning snow. “We should get going,” she said, hand still pressed against the stump. Shiori was no expert at medical jutsu, but she had managed to close up the wound and stretch out enough flesh to cover the fat and muscle and bone. There would be scars, and it still needed medical attention to prevent any major infections, but Miwa would live.

Kakashi jumped down from the attic and handed Tenzou his bloody kunai.

“We got everything?” Kakashi asked. Tenzou held up Shiori’s mask and headband, as well as Miwa’s. Miwa reached into a pocket of her flak jacket and held up one of her chakra knuckles. The other the was already secure on her hand.

Kakashi nodded, then started out the door and back into the woods, back towards home.

 

“Aren’t you going to lecture me?” Miwa asked after an hour of slow running. Her balance was shot with her arm gone, and she was too fatigued and anemic to run at full speed, so they were stuck traveling on the ground instead of the trees at a pace only slightly faster than a jog.

“I think losing your arm is lecture enough,” Kakashi replied. “However, if you still need a lecture, I’m sure Tenzou can offer one. He enjoys lecturing.”

Tenzou coughed and gently hit Kakashi on the shoulder.

“I can’t believe I lost my arm,” Miwa grumbled, and Kakashi stopped running. He turned to face Miwa and pointed his finger at her. Tenzou stopped and stood a few feet away, watching.

“I can,” Kakashi said, “I can completely believe you lost your arm. And you’re lucky you didn’t lose more. You put yourself at risk, you put the mission at risk, you put us at risk. The only reason this mission wasn’t a failure is because Shiori is smarter than any of us thought.”

Miwa groaned and didn’t reply.

Kakashi took a step closer. “Listen,” he said, “I’m never going to tell you this again.”

Miwa stood up a little bit straighter, and Tenzou folded his arms over his chest.

“You have to be able to admit when you’ve made mistakes,” Kakashi said, “and more importantly, you have to be able to tell when you need to rely on your teammates. You have to trust your team. My last mission, I fucked up. I fucked up bad. I nearly got myself killed, and more importantly,” Kakashi pointed his thumb at Tenzou, “I nearly got Tenzou killed. I was pretty sure I had gotten him killed, in fact. He saved my life, but I put him into that position because I was stubborn, didn’t want to admit that I might be wrong, didn’t want to admit that I needed help.”

Kakashi turned back around and started running again. Miwa followed wordlessly, and Tenzou needed a few moments to remember how to breathe.

 

Kakashi decided they should stop for the night when they were nearing the border between Land of Hot Water and Land of Fire. The spot wasn’t exactly prime camping land, but it would do for a night. There was no convenient stream close by and this spot was closer to the Land of Sound than Tenzou felt was necessary. The new nation was supposedly peaceful, but everyone had their doubts and multiple other missions were planned to infiltrate the country.

Miwa fought her bedroll out of her pack and laid it out with significant effort. Kakashi moved to help her, but Tenzou flung his forearm into his path. Kakashi watched Tenzou out of the corner of his eye for a moment, then nodded. No coddling.

“I can’t believe my career is over. I’m fifteen and I have to retire,” Miwa grumbled.

Tenzou sat down on the ground and started picking rations out of his pack.

“Not necessarily,” Kakashi said, “you can still be a ninja with a couple months of rehab. And you’re not even automatically out of ANBU.”

“Really?” Miwa asked. She pulled off her mask and Tenzou could see from the grimace on her face that she wasn’t believing him. “I don’t exactly see a whole lot of one-armed ninjas running around.”

Kakashi pulled a granola bar and a book out of his pack. “Not true, there are plenty.”

“Name one,” Miwa countered. Tenzou stood and started spreading out his bedroll next to Kakashi’s.

“Okay, well, you’re right on that,” Kakashi admitted.

“But that doesn’t mean you can’t be one,” Tenzou offered.

Miwa bit her lip and Tenzou pressed forward, “There have been ninjas missing eyes, there have been hard of hearing ninjas and even deaf ninjas. There’s no rule saying that you can’t still be a ninja. Learn how to perform jutsus one-handed. That’s something that you should be trying to do anyways, in preparation for doing seal-less jutsus. Your chakra knuckles will work just fine on only one hand. And you’ll regain your balance in time.” Tenzou sat back and looked Miwa in the eye. “You learned a harsh lesson. Like Kakashi said earlier, it was something that could have cost you your life. Now you can either step out of the field, or you can put what you’ve learned to good use and become an even better ninja.”

Miwa chewed her lip for another second before standing up. She nearly fell without the balance provided by her left arm, but managed to correct in time.

“I guess.” She pulled a granola bar out of her pack. “I guess I’ll go practice one-handed genjutsu. I’ll take first watch, and I’ll come wake one of you up when I get too sleepy.”

Miwa disappeared into the woods, and Tenzou listened to the leaflitter crackling under her footsteps.

Kakashi stretched out on his bedroll and dropped his book onto his chest. Tenzou watched the rise and fall of Kakashi’s ribs for a moment.

“You think she’s going to be okay?” he asked under his breath.

Kakashi nodded. “I think she’s going to be a better ninja now than she was when she had two arms.”

Tenzou closed his eyes and thought about what Kakashi had said. To him, the fact that Tenzou could have died was somehow more significant than the fact that Kakashi could have died. Tenzou could feel his chest tighten with simultaneous pleasure and pain.

He opened his eyes and rolled onto his side to face Kakashi.

Kakashi was staring at him. His headband was off and his scarred eye was closed, but his normal eye was open and trained on Tenzou.

Tenzou swallowed. “Don’t say that, that me dying would somehow be more significant than you dying.” Kakashi snorted so Tenzou continued, “how about neither of us die.”

Kakashi’s face was close, Tenzou realized. He swallowed again.

“How about we make out instead of talking about dying?” Kakashi asked.

Tenzou blinked and could feel his cheeks warm up. “That. That’s definitely an idea.”

“A good idea,” Kakashi assured him. He didn’t move any closer though, so Tenzou sat up on his elbow and carefully peeled Kakashi’s face mask down before closing his eyes and leaning down to kiss him.

It was easier to find a rhythm this time, with Kakashi fully conscious and Tenzou very minimally more experienced. Kakashi didn’t bother doing anything closed-lipped, so Tenzou could feel Kakashi’s tongue pressing against his lips nearly immediately.

The kiss was bitter because nobody brushed their teeth on missions, but Tenzou didn’t care. One of Kakashi’s hands cupped Tenzou’s cheek and the other pushed his shoulder until Tenzou rolled onto his back. Kakashi followed him, shifted so he was on top of Tenzou, and Tenzou wasn’t sure how to breathe anymore.

Kakashi’s thighs were against Tenzou’s hips, and Kakashi’s tongue was pressing into his mouth. One of Tenzou’s hands was tangled in Kakashi’s hair, and the other rested on his hip, finger brushing at the sliver of warm exposed skin.

Kakashi pulled his mouth away and Tenzou gasped for air. He could feel Kakashi’s fingers tugging at the high neck of his shirt, and after a moment Kakashi’s lips were on his skin, kissing along his pulse point up to his jaw, then back to his mouth. One of them groaned into the other’s mouth and Tenzou wasn’t sure who it was.

Tenzou pulled his hand away from Kakashi’s hip and wrapped his arm around his waist, then rolled onto his side, bringing Kakashi with him. For a moment, Tenzou pulled away and opened his eyes. Kakashi’s eyes were squeezed shut, and his brow furrowed the same way it was when he was concentrating on a complicated mission or a sex scene in one of his books. Tenzou pulled Kakashi back against him, wrapping his arms around him and hugging him to his chest, and started kissing him again.

Suddenly, Tenzou was alone and Kakashi was sitting on his bedroll, book in hand and face mask back in place. Tenzou blinked.

“Don’t tell me that was a dream,” Tenzou groaned. His throat was raw and the words barely creeked out.

“It wasn’t, don’t worry,” Kakashi said, and then Miwa stepped into the clearing.

“I’m going to bed. One of you take second watch,” she announced.

Tenzou buried his face in his hands and tried to catch his breath and will his blush away.

“How can it be second watch when you were only gone for twenty minutes? That hardly counts as a first watch,” Kakashi countered.

Miwa laughed and Tenzou could hear her flopping onto her bedroll. “I lost a fucking arm today, give me a break.”

“That’s fair,” Kakashi said, and he stood up. Tenzou moved his hands to watch as Kakashi stretched and pulled his shirt back into place. “You two get some sleep, I’ll go read up in a tree.” Kakashi glanced down at Tenzou, and he could recognize a smile from the way Kakashi’s eye shown. Tenzou smiled back and Kakashi climbed into the nearest tree.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tenzou discovers the joys of frottage; plot has M-rated elements from this chapter onwards.

They were close enough to home that they decided to skip a second night of camping and just continue moving through the next night. They reached the gates of Konoha around midnight, with Kotetsu sleeping at his post as usual, and Izumo wrapping a blanket around him.

“Kid lost her arm?” Izumo asked Tenzou, and Miwa took off her ANBU mask so she could glare at him. Izumo laughed and motioned them through, while Kotetsu shifted and started snoring.

“I can get to the hospital myself,” Miwa said, but Tenzou was already carrying her pack for her and didn’t mind going a little further. So much for no coddling. Kakashi, however, waved them goodbye and jumped onto the nearest rooftop before heading towards the ANBU housing.

Miwa was back to clutching her stump again as Tenzou walked with her to the hospital. He took a breath and stared up at the stars. They were much less visible in the center of Konoha than out in the field, where there was no light pollution.

Nothing was open except the bars, and Tenzou and Miwa waved at anybody they knew who was outside having a cigarette.

“Is it true,” Miwa asked, “what Kakashi said? That he fucked up on his last mission?”

Tenzou adjusted his grip on Miwa’s pack. “Yeah, he did mess up. He had severe chakra exhaustion but didn’t want to admit it. Got us both into trouble. He should have been more honest on how drained he felt, and I should have been more adamant about taking over his watches. It turned what should have been a fairly easy mission into one where we both nearly died.”

“It’s hard to imagine Kakashi fucking up,” Miwa admitted. “I mean, I know I give him a hard time and try to boss him around, but I can’t really imagine him messing up like that.”

They reached the hospital entrance, and Tenzou could already see one of the nurses bringing out a wheelchair for Miwa.

“He’s just human, Miwa,” Tenzou said, “Has normal human wants, needs, and flaws, as much as he tries to pretend he doesn’t.”

Miwa nodded and held out her hand for her pack. Tenzou passed it off, then waved goodbye before heading for the ANBU housing.

 

It was one in the morning by the time Tenzou reached the ANBU headquarters. He knew he should go to bed, but his hair was sticky with blood and he reeked of sweat. It was only an added bonus that this late at night the communal showers would be empty.

Tenzou peeled his clothes off and folded them before leaving them on the shelf outside the showers. The tile floor was cold against the soft skin of his bare feet. The thick callouses on his heels and toes felt nothing.

Tenzou picked a shower head in the corner of the room. He liked to lean against walls while taking a post-mission shower, and the more walls the merrier. He stood aside while the water stream heated up, and stepped in once it started steaming. Tenzou could feel his back muscles loosen with the heat and pounding of the water, and he leaned his forehead against the cool tile to let the hot water cascade down his back, ass, and thighs.

“Nice ass,” someone behind Tenzou said. He glanced over his shoulder. Kakashi.

Kakashi was shirtless and mask-less, a towel slung low around his hips. Tenzou turned back around to face the wall.

“Hey Kakashi,” he said, “thanks for the compliment, I guess.”

“It’s a good ass, just saying,” Kakashi said. “And I wanted to talk to you, actually.”

“Hm?” Tenzou spent a moment resisting the urge to turn around. He could hear Kakashi’s feet slapping against the tile over the rush of water. Then the twisting of the tap next to him and another stream starting. The water pressure of Tenzou's showerhead immediately dropped and the pounding turned into a prickly downpour.

“I think we need to talk about all this kissing business,” Kakashi said.

Tenzou looked to his side, where Kakashi was lathering his arms with soap. The towel was gone, Kakashi was naked, and Tenzou swallowed.

“Kissing business, yeah, we should. Talk about that,” Tenzou said.

“I need you to know that if we keep at this, if we start having sex,” Kakashi said. Tenzou swallowed again and stared hard at the tile in front of him. There were some mold spots, it needed to be scrubbed. But then Kakashi started talking again and Tenzou’s eyes were drawn back to him. “I need you to know that I don’t do dating. I don’t do relationships. If we start having sex, I need you to know that it will not be an exclusive thing. I have sex with a lot of people, and if you and I start having sex, I will continue having sex with lots of people. And I don’t care if you have sex with lots of people.”

Tenzou nodded, but he wasn’t paying complete attention to what Kakashi was saying. Instead, he was watching how the soap and water ran down Kakashi’s body, how his hips dipped, the curve of his ass, the heft of his hardening cock--

“Tenzou, I’m talking to you,” Kakashi said. Tenzou looked back up. He knew he was flushed, and half hard too, and all the steam was making it harder to think as well. “Do you want me or not? Knowing this?”

“Yes,” Tenzou said. His voice was rough and the word nearly caught in his throat. “Yes, I want you. I want you.”

Kakashi smiled, his lips curving up into something feral. He took a step forward, water splashing under his feet, and pressed his hand against Tenzou’s neck. Tenzou licked his lips and focused on Kakashi’s one open eye.

“You want me?” Kakashi asked. Tenzou nodded.

“Right now?” he asked. Tenzou nodded again. The water was streaming down their faces, and he could feel Kakashi’s breath against his mouth. Tenzou knew he was probably sweating but that didn’t exactly matter in the showers.

“Well, then let’s do this,” Kakashi said. And he took a final step forward before he started kissing Tenzou.

The kiss had little to no rhythm, but Tenzou didn’t notice. He was too invested in the feelings of Kakashi’s skin under his fingertips, learning how the dip of Kakashi’s hips felt rather than how it looked, memorizing the way Kakashi’s breath hitched when Tenzou’s index fingers slid down his thighs.

Kakashi’s hand was splayed across Tenzou’s ribs, and his fingers carded through Tenzou’s hair. Tenzou licked a stripe of Kakashi’s neck, pulse throbbing under his tongue, and Kakashi tasted like soap and sweat and salt and under normal circumstances the taste would make Tenzou gag but these were not normal circumstances.

“I want you,” Tenzou breathed. His legs felt weak. “I want you.”

“I know, I heard you,” Kakashi said. He slid his hands down to Tenzou’s hips and jerked them forward so they were pressed together, hard cocks rubbing.

Tenzou thrust forward and hissed into Kakashi’s neck at the friction. Kakashi brought their mouths together again and his hand slipped between them. He grasped their cocks in his hand, fingers stretched across their combined gerth, and Tenzou thrust up into his hand.

“Fuck,” Tenzou said. His thighs were shaking and he wasn’t sure what to do with his mouth other than to keep it on Kakashi’s skin at all times.

In between his swallowed groans, Tenzou could hear Kakashi make noises that were mostly M’s against Tenzou’s ear, pitch increasing with every upwards drag of his hand.

Kakashi’s rhythm was slow, too slow. Tenzou bit back a groan, then reached his hand down to join Kakashi’s. He wrapped his hand around their cocks, fingers pressing against Kakashi’s. With two final hard jerks and a moan into the crook of Kakashi’s neck, Tenzou came.

Everything felt warm and slow, and Tenzou took a few moments to blink and appreciate the full-body tingles before he adjusted his grip on Kakashi’s still-hard cock. He squeezed a little harder than he did when touching himself, and rubbed his thumb across the head of Kakashi’s cock with each pass.

“Fuck, Tenzou,” Kakashi half-moaned before pressing his mouth against Tenzou’s in a messy, sloppy, wet kiss as he came.

Tenzou leaned against the wall behind him and held Kakashi to his chest. His arms were wrapped around Kakashi in a hug, and he breathed into the mess of dripping wet hair behind Kakashi’s ear. Everything felt soft and warm. Tenzou didn’t want to move. He didn’t want Kakashi to move either. He wasn't sure how long they stood there, but he knew it wasn’t long enough.

“I want you,” Tenzou whispered. His voice felt ragged in his throat.

He could feel the rumble of Kakashi’s laugh against his chest. “You just had me.”

“I know,” Tenzou replied, “and I still want you.”

“I’m not sure you’ve got the stamina for that right now,” Kakashi said with another laugh, and he kissed Tenzou, closed-mouth and soft, before pulling away and leaving the showers. Tenzou watched him go, following the curve and shift of Kakashi's remarkably flat ass as he left.

“See you tomorrow,” Tenzou could hear Kakashi call out before the bathroom door closed, and Tenzou finally listened to his shaking legs and sat down on the floor, water--now significantly less warm--beating down on his back.


	4. Chapter 4

When Tenzou stepped into the hokage's round office four weeks later, he was not surprised to see Kakashi next to the Third's desk. Kakashi was choosing Tenzou as his partner for nearly every mission now, something that Tenzou did not feel inclined to complain about. They hadn’t had another encounter like the one in the shower because they typically had a new-ANBU recruit as a third wheel, but Tenzou was happy with quick sloppy makeouts in the leaflitter.

The Third was dressed in all his hokage finery, complete with his triangular hat and white robes. He sat at his desk, nearly hidden by stacks of paper he was signing, and did not look up when Tenzou entered the room or closed the door behind him.

"You two are to escort me," the Third said without looking up, "I have been summoned to meet with the Feudal Lord. There are no current known threats against me in the area, but I still require an escort there and back. The Feudal Lord has his own armed watch that will guard myself and the perimeter during the meeting itself, you two will simply be on standby." The Third held out two pieces of paper, and Tenzou stepped forward to take them. Identical maps. Tenzou passed one to Kakashi, who looked down at the map with complete disinterest.

"Study the route," the Third said, "we leave in five minutes."

 

Escorting the Third to the Feudal Lord's palace was wonderfully, wonderfully easy. They moved at a slow pace (slow for ninjas at least) and stuck to the roads instead of the trees. The Third was silent, Kakashi read a book while walking, and Tenzou enjoyed the twittering of birds in the trees.

However, every half hour or so Tenzou would catch Kakashi stealing a glance that made Tenzou's stomach clench with a warm, slow-churning desire. Tenzou wasn't quite sure how Kakashi managed to convey so much with just one eye and part of an eyebrow.

 

The Palace Guard met them a few minutes from the main gate. They were a surprisingly motley group, dressed in matching uniforms of white and red modified for each guard. There was a woman with a sword, a man with a bow and arrow, and another woman who carried nothing at all, but Tenzou could feel her chakra, hot and hissing and steaming like lava meeting ocean waves.

The swordswoman handed a scroll to Kakashi, who unraveled it and checked it for any paper bombs or seals before handing it off to the Third. The Third nodded to the swordswoman, who held out her hand for a very complicated handshake that Tenzou could not catch the movements of. Then, wordlessly, the guards turned and led them towards the palace.

The Third moved to walk between Tenzou and the guards, and Kakashi dropped back so he was in step with Tenzou.

"It was a mission like this one, when we met," Kakashi said, the first words spoken in hours.

Tenzou nodded. "Somewhat, yes. You were escorting the Third and I was there to assassinate him on Danzo's orders."

Kakashi bumped his shoulder against Tenzou's, warm skin pressing into warm skin, then pulled away and pressed his hand against Tenzou's shoulder blade for a brief moment.

"If you two are done reminiscing about various attempts to kill me," the Third snapped, "we're here."

Tenzou looked up and, indeed, they had reached the main gates of the palace. The gates were essentially what Tenzou had been anticipating: massive, wrought iron with gold accents and gildings and plenty of spikes mixed in to make the elegant curls at least a little intimidating.

Beyond the gate was a pathway through a grassy field, and then the palace itself. It was at least three stories tall, with traditional roofs curving away from the house and providing ample shade for the balconies and verandas that Tenzou could see even despite the distance.

“Well now I know why Konoha’s economy is always struggling, looks like that’s where our money’s going,” Kakashi muttered. Only Tenzou and Third heard it, and they both nodded stiffly in agreement.

 

Unsurprisingly, Tenzou and Kakashi were not introduced to the Feudal Lord. Actually, they didn’t even catch sight of him. The palace guard took over security, and Tenzou and Kakashi were politely escorted to their room.

They were sharing a very nice room with an adjacent well-sized bathroom and a walk-in closet that was presumably for long-term guests. The flooring was a light-colored wood free of any wear patterns. Against the far wall, below a bank of wide windows, there were two large beds and a screen folded against the wall between them to use for privacy. Tenzou felt like that screen wasn’t going to get any use, and he flushed at that thought. Touching Kakashi was definitely something on his agenda, maybe even getting to hear Kakashi make those soft noises against his neck again. But sex? Tenzou bit his lip. He wasn’t sure if he was ready for that, let alone in an unfamiliar bed in an unfamiliar place. Intimacy like that should happen in intimate locations, Tenzou reasoned.

Kakashi stood in the doorway, taking in the nice, small room with his lazy, uninterested eye. Tenzou felt tension leaking into his shoulders, and it was a strangely unwelcome tension. As Tenzou set his pack on one of the beds, he could feel Kakashi sizing up the situation, sizing him up.

“I’m going to go read on the roof,” Kakashi announced, and he dropped his pack on the floor next to the door before walking back down the hall.

Tenzou sat on a bed and sighed. He was definitely nervous. Excited, but nervous. He didn’t know what he was doing. Everything felt so new and fragile, and like a wrong move would make everything fall to pieces. They hadn’t even discussed what was happening between them beyond the discussion in the showers which Tenzou had barely paid attention to.

Tenzou sighed again, then pulled a book out of his pack and left to find Kakashi. Nerves aside, time alone with Kakashi was rare and precious. He was fairly certain that it was an unspoken rule that they weren’t supposed to go on the roof, but also they were ninjas and anyone who expected them to not climb up tall structures was a bit delusional.

It was easy enough to find his way back to the front door, but once Tenzou got on the roof he realized how truly big the palace was. The roof extended for what felt like kilometers in each direction, and there were multiple levels.

Tenzou found Kakashi laying on a flat plateau at the peak of the highest roof, in the full sun, his grey hair matching the grey cement under his head. As Tenzou approached, he realize that Kakashi’s book was spread over his face and his hands were tucked under his head.

Napping.

The light tension Tenzou had felt earlier slipped back into his joints and muscles, and Tenzou stopped walking. He watched the rise and fall of Kakashi’s chest and felt like he was intruding.

“Are you just going to stare at me or are you going to come over here?” Kakashi asked. His voice was muffled by the pages of his book. Tenzou smiled. The strain in his back eased.

“I’ll come read with you,” Tenzou assured him, and he finished climbing up the eaves of the roof and came to stand on the flat peak, his sandals almost touching Kakashi’s knee.

Kakashi hummed and shifted to the side so Tenzou had room to sit. The flat space wasn’t very wide; it had initially been built for sentries and archers during times of war. When Tenzou settled down, legs crossed, the length of his left thigh pressed against Kakashi’s.

Even with the fabric of their pants between them, the warm of Kakashi’s skin seeped into Tenzou. He thought about the night in the showers and fought down a blush.

“What are you blushing about?” Kakashi asked. Tenzou looked up. He picked up his book and lazily turned pages, his eye focused on Tenzou.

“Nothing,” Tenzou assured him. “It’s just the glare of the sun.”

Tenzou thought about the night in the showers a lot, about the noises Kakashi had made and the way Kakashi’s hands felt against his skin and how hard he had come.

Kakashi nodded and went back to his book.

The sun was indeed very bright on the roof, especially with its dark eaves reflecting the light. The air was cool and fresh this high up, though, so Tenzou took a deep breath and scanned the scenery.

The grassy fields shifted with the wind, and beyond them trees extended in every direction. Those closest to the palace were well-pruned and diligently maintained, but the ones further off Tenzou could tell were still wild and unruly. In the distance a hawk swooped out of the forest and dove back in.

Kakashi wordlessly turned a page and Tenzou took another breath. The tension faded. Things felt less fragile. Still not shatter-proof, but studier.

Even though Tenzou had come up to the roof to read with Kakashi, he didn’t feel like opening his book at the moment. Kakashi’s thigh felt too warm against his, the breeze too nice. Tenzou closed his eyes. He just wanted to sit here forever.

But then he felt Kakashi shift next to him. After another second, there was a tug at Tenzou’s sleeve, and he opened his eyes and turned.

Kakashi had sat up, and was staring at Tenzou with a narrowed eye. His book was closed and next to Kakashi’s hand. His other hand was fiddling with the hem of his mask.

Tenzou blinked for a second. “Um?” he asked. Kakashi finished pulling down his mask and smiled at Tenzou, a hint of teeth glinting.

Tenzou blinked again, then understood. Kakashi wanted a kiss. Tenzou immediately wanted to provide that kiss.

Tenzou leaned forward and gently knocked his forehead against Kakashi’s before pressing their lips together.

Kakashi’s fingers immediately dug into Tenzou’s hair, and Tenzou wrapped an arm around Kakashi’s waist. Tenzou still wasn’t good at coordinating kisses, but Kakashi knew what he was doing. There was tongue and teeth were scraping against Tenzou’s lower lip and what felt like saliva was running down his chin. Tenzou pulled away for a second to breathe, then kissed Kakashi hard, teeth bumping into teeth and noses knocking together.

The last time they had been able to kiss for this long was nearly a week ago.

One of Kakashi’s hands had shifted to the back of Tenzou’s neck, and the other hand had found its way to Tenzou’s hip. His fingers tugged Tenzou’s shirt out of his pants and then they were tracing the curves of Tenzou’s hip, stomach, ribs, chest. Tenzou gasped with each new touch, and Kakashi kissed him harder. Tenzou didn’t want Kakashi to stop.

Kakashi’s pushed his palm against Tenzou’s chest until Tenzou leaned back on his elbows, and Kakashi shifted so he was straddling him. His thighs dug into Tenzou’s hips. Kakashi bit at Tenzou’s lips, and then he started tugging down the high neck of Tenzou’s shirt with his one free hand. It took Tenzou a moment to realize what Kakashi was trying to do, but once he did Tenzou helped pull down the fabric. Kakashi shifted away and started kissing Tenzou’s neck, teeth and tongue dragging across his skin and leaving goosebumps in their wake.

And then, all too quickly, Kakashi’s lips were off Tenzou, and Kakashi was sitting up. Tenzou opened his eyes--although he hadn’t remembered closing them--and saw that Kakashi was digging something out of the pocket of his vest. A foil packet, a condom. Tenzou gaped at Kakashi.

“What? I’m going to give you a blowjob,” Kakashi said simply.

“Kakashi, we, we’re on the roof of the Feudal Lord’s palace,” Tenzou hissed.

Kakashi waved a hand in the air. “Do you see anybody watching us?”

Tenzou, still leaning back on his elbows, glanced around. Indeed, there was nobody, just like how there had been absolutely nobody when he had first climbed up on the roof.

Kakashi shifted backwards until he was resting on Tenzou’s thighs and put his hands on Tenzou’s hips. Then he paused.

“Do you not want a blowjob?” Kakashi asked after a moment of silence.

Tenzou chewed his lip for a second and thought. On the one hand, they were on the roof of the Feudal Lord’s palace, not exactly a private place. On the other hand, Tenzou wanted Kakashi. Bad. Kakashi’s mouth on his cock sounded like an amazing idea, possibly the best idea to ever occur in the entire history of mankind. They hadn’t had a chance to get this close since the showers.

Tenzou sat up and kissed Kakashi again. “I want you,” Tenzou said when they parted. “Please.”

Kakashi grinned at him and licked his lips before his hands started unbuttoning Tenzou’s fly and working his pants down. The maneuver was difficult with Kakashi sitting on his thighs, so Kakashi had to relocate to the patch of cement next to them and Tenzou lifted his hips up enough for Kakashi to slide his pants and boxers down to his ankles in one fail swoop. Tenzou wiggled one foot out of his pants, his sandals catching on the fabric.

The cement was hot and rough under his bare ass, pebbles digging into his skin, but Tenzou didn’t spend too much time dwelling on that because his cock was already getting hard and Kakashi was looking at it and licking his lips and ripping open the condom package. Tenzou wasn’t sure what to do with his hands so folded them on his chest.

Kakashi leaned forward to kiss him while he rolled the condom down Tenzou’s length, careful to get out any air pockets and squeezing just enough to make Tenzou’s breath stutter and his hands clench.

“Nice day for a blow job,” Kakashi said before sitting back and nudging Tenzou’s thighs apart with the palms of his hands. Soft. Kakashi had taken off his gloves. Tenzou wasn’t sure how Kakashi had such soft hands, but pressed against his inner thighs and spreading his legs apart, Tenzou was positive that Kakashi’s hands were the warmest and softest thing in the world. Kakashi was barely touching him and Tenzou was already struggling to hold back a gasp.

Tenzou sat up on his elbows and watched as Kakashi lay down on his stomach between Tenzou’s legs. Kakashi’s fingers ran up the length of his thighs and came to rest at his hips, thumbs rubbing gentle circles. Tenzou was pretty sure he wasn’t supposed to be sitting for this, but he sat up the rest of the way anyways and ran a hand through Kakashi’s messy hair.

And then, Kakashi took the tip of Yamato’s cock into his mouth and Tenzou hissed and tightened his fingers in Kakashi’s hair. He kept enough presence of mind not to pull, but just barely.

Kakashi’s hair brushed against Tenzou’s bellybutton as Kakashi took more and more of him in, one hand working what didn’t fit in his mouth while his other hand held a firm grip on Tenzou’s hip, thumb still working soft slow circles. The grip was almost bruising, and Tenzou wasn’t sure why Kakashi was squeezing so tightly until Kakashi started sucking and Tenzou’s hips jerked involuntarily.

Tenzou only spent about a minute and a half breathing heavy and biting his lip and running his hand through Kakashi’s hair before he came with a groan. Kakashi’s hand tightened on Tenzou’s hip while he rode out his orgasm, but his thumb didn’t stop making circles until Tenzou’s hand dropped from Kakashi’s hair to his shoulder.

The pebbles in the cement were still biting into his bare ass, and he was vaguely aware of the fact that he should pull his pants up, but everything felt too warm and soft and slightly blurred at the edges for any of that. He watched Kakashi sit up, tie off the condom, and throw it to the side so it landed on one of the eaves with a flop. His breathing was still heavy and all he wanted was Kakashi.

When Kakashi turned back to face him, mask pulled back up, Tenzou reached out and grabbed Kakashi’s shoulder. He tugged gently until Kakashi understood, or at least pretended too, and moved close enough for Tenzou to wrap his arms around Kakashi and breathe into his neck.

“Good blowjob, heh?” Kakashi asked. Tenzou nodded and squeezed a little tighter, his lips trailing against the fabric of Kakashi’s mask. After a moment of regulated breathing, Tenzou lay down and pulled Kakashi with him.

Kakashi pressed his face against Tenzou’s chest. “I should have figured you were into post-orgasm cuddles.” His mask caught against the snaps and zippers of Tenzou’s vest.

“You figured right,” Tenzou said into Kakashi’s hair, and Kakashi snaked his arms around Tenzou’s waist--with considerable cooperation on Tenzou’s part--and tucked his face under Tenzou’s chin.

 

They came down from the roof, mostly-unread books tucked under their arms, as the sun began to set and the nighttime chill started to set in.

Tenzou still felt a full-body warmth, and he didn’t want to interact with other people at the moment. Just Kakashi. It wasn’t any feeling of shame or embarrassment. He wanted to go and sit in their room in a comfortable silence, wanted to kiss the tip of Kakashi’s scar and hold him. Kakashi wouldn’t got for that though, and Tenzou knew that.

As soon as they reached their room and Kakashi stepped into the bathroom to rinse his mouth out, dread settled on Tenzou’s shoulders. He had forgotten the potential complication for the night. Sleeping arrangements. What they were going to do. If they were going to have sex. His shoulders tensed and Tenzou stood in the center of the room, staring at one of the beds, thinking. Sex sounded nice, but fighting to stay quiet for fear of being interrupted and leaving a mess in somebody else’s bed did not. He wouldn’t mind getting frisky with Kakashi again, but sex was a big thing in Tenzou’s opinion. He wanted it, eventually, and most specifically with Kakashi, but he didn’t want his first time to be in a stranger’s house.

Kakashi returned from the bathroom and sat down on the bed Tenzou was staring at. He had clearly been thinking about the same topic as Tenzou. “So, wanna have sex after dinner? I’ve got lube and more condoms and an impressively flexible asshole.”

Tenzou swallowed and folded his arms and watched as Kakashi blinked a few times and furrowed his visible eyebrow.

“Actually,” Tenzou began, “I’m not sure if. If I’m ready for that. At least not right now, in a stranger’s house.”

Kakashi’s mask shifted, in what Tenzou assumed was preparation to say something sassy, and then the steward knocked on the door and summoned them to dinner. It was a good example of the kind of interruption Tenzou had worried about, and he took the opportunity to flee.

 

They ate in a large bare room adjacent to the kitchen. There were empty seats towards the end of the long guard-filled table, but Tenzou didn’t take one of them. Instead, he sat down between two guardswomen and ate silently. He needed to think. The two women talked to each other over his head, and Kakashi ate alone at the end of the table.

Tenzou had made a mistake, he was sure of this. The only reason Kakashi was interested in him beyond levels of mere friendship was because he wanted sex. No strings attached fuckbuddy. Tenzou was aware of these facts. But things were different for Tenzou. He’d had feelings for Kakashi for a long time For years. He was willing to take what he could get, so if being Kakashi’s fuckbuddy was the best way to get close to him, Tenzou could live with that. But by saying no to sex, wasn’t Tenzou undermining the entire reason Kakashi was even interested? Now he was probably going to walk in on Kakashi cock-deep in one of the guardswomen when went back to their room. The thought made Tenzou’s stomach churn and stinging bile hiss up his throat to leave his mouth bitter.

Tenzou pushed his plate away and rested his forehead against the table. He had no clue what he was doing. One of the guardswomen patted his head, ignored Tenzou's instinctive flinch, and then continued talking to her friend sitting on his other side.


	5. Chapter 5

Either by coincidence or by Kakashi’s design, they walked back to their room together. The silence was biting. Kakashi tried to walk in step with Tenzou, even bumping shoulders with him at first, so Tenzou walked a little faster and ended up five strides ahead with Kakashi trailing behind him. Kakashi did not make an effort to catch up.

Acid was crawling up Tenzou’s esophagus again and he knew they needed to talk. Talking about things, important things, emotions and such, was always so difficult to do with Kakashi. He derailed the conversation as fast as he could. Usually Tenzou didn't mind that fact; it was a fundamental part of Kakashi after all. But at this moment it was a very inconvenient facet of Kakashi's personality.

“I’m going to take a bath,” Tenzou announced as soon as he stepped into the room, Kakashi still trailing behind him, and Tenzou hid in the bathroom to think some more.

 

It was a nice bathroom, Tenzou was already aware of this. There were soaps and shampoos so he decided a bath with some bubbles would be appropriate. He stripped out of his clothes, picking out dirt and pebbles from the interior of the seat of his pants and briefly, fondly, remembering how they got there, and then climbed in when the water was just a touch below scalding.

The bubbles smelled like lavender and were surprisingly helpful in terms of brainstorming potential solutions. Tenzou considered just sleeping in the bath tub and silently weighed the pros and cons of doing that (pros: stressful situation avoided; cons: Kakashi will be confused, the weird situation between them will get worse, could potentially drown, water will eventually get cold, pruny fingers).

Tenzou was preparing to make a decision with regards to sleeping in the bathtub when the door cracked open and Kakashi announced, “I’m coming in, Tenzou.”

Tenzou sunk deeper in the bubbles. “Okay.” It wasn’t like there was anything Kakashi hadn’t seen, and he probably just needed to take a piss.

Kakashi left the door open and some of the steam escaped. Tenzou was sad to see it leave, but he was quickly distracted by Kakashi coming over to the bath tub and sitting down, back against the porcelain. If Tenzou were inclined to shift closer to the edge of the tub, his shoulder would brush Kakashi’s messy hair. Tenzou took a second to consider that inclination while Kakashi cracked open his book and started reading.

The tension began to melt away, the hot water relaxing Tenzou’s muscles and Kakashi’s calm presence unknotting the mental stress. Even with everything so fragile, Kakashi was still willing to spend time with him. That was definitely a good sign. Tenzou sunk down a bit further in the water and blew some bubbles. The room was silent except for the sloshing of water and the turning of pages.

Tenzou peeked over Kakashi’s shoulder to investigate what he was reading. Another romance novel, not surprising. Tenzou squinted and read a few lines.

_His fingers carded through Rhett’s hair. Knots were gently untangled by the pads of his digits, and Rhett sighed into Bradley’s broad and warm chest. This feeling, Rhett realized, was what the idea of home meant._

Tenzou’s lip curled slightly at the lackluster prose, but ultimately he was surprised Kakashi was reading something so… mushy. Tenzou had assumed that Kakashi always just skimmed the books until he got to the sex parts, but no, he was paying attention to each and every word.

Kakashi leaned back and his head bumped into Tenzou’s shoulder. When Kakashi didn’t jerk away, Tenzou moved to press his forehead against Kakashi’s hair.

“About earlier,” Tenzou began. He swallowed and tried to think of what to say next.

“It’s okay,” Kakashi mumbled. Tenzou could feel the rumble of Kakashi’s voice. One of Kakashi’s hands snaked back over his head and he ran his fingers through Tenzou’s hair, nails catching and tugging, but not enough to hurt. Tenzou hadn’t had a chance to dunk his head and wash his hair yet, so for the moment he leaned into Kakashi’s touch.

“I’m not interested in sex unless you’re interested in it too,” Kakashi said. “It’s no big deal.”

“Thank you,” Tenzou mumbled against the back of Kakashi’s neck.

“It’s not a matter of kindness,” Kakashi continued. “You’ve never had sex, right?”

Tenzou pulled away and sputtered in the water for a second. Finally he said, “You’re right.”

Tenzou was embarrassed to admit it. He was 20 years old. Most ninjas were having sex by the age of 16, using it as stress relief half the time. But not Tenzou. He hadn’t seen the appeal in having sex with someone he didn’t care about, and there was only one person he cared about.

“Well, when you've had as much sex as I have, you realize that it should always be awesome, or at least orgasm-inducing. If it's not, if you're not into it, you can just stop it right there. Anyone who tries to push you is fucked up and not worth your time.”

Tenzou pushed his forehead into the nape of Kakashi's neck and nodded. He used the palm of his hand to make small waves in the tub. The conversation was strange, and one that Tenzou hadn’t expected, but it made it easier to breathe nonetheless.

"We don't have to do anything tonight," Kakashi finished, and he turned another page, “I was just thinking it was a good opportunity.” Tenzou lifted some soap bubbles out of the water on his fingertips. They were starting to pop, and Tenzou squinted at them and watched as he thought.

"Actually," Tenzou began, "I was thinking. It would be nice to, well, share a bed."

Kakashi snorted and it took Tenzou a moment to realize it wasn't in derision.

"Sure, we can do that," Kakashi agreed. Tenzou gently closed his fist around a mass of bubbles and felt them pop against his skin.

 

Kakashi had been surprisingly amicable to the idea of sharing a bed, and in fact he seemed more comfortable with the thought than Tenzou. While Tenzou fumbled with his sleeping clothes (politely provided by some of the palace attendants), Kakashi picked a bed and lay down under the covers to one side, the sheet pulled up to cover the lower half of his face. Presumably it was out of habit. Tenzou turned away for a moment so Kakashi wouldn’t see him grin.

“Nice ass,” Kakashi said as Tenzou started pulling on his pajama pants.

Tenzou wasn’t sure how to reply to that, so he just said, “You already told me that. In the showers.”

“I’m gonna keep saying it,” Kakashi assured him, “you have a really great ass.”

Tenzou fought the urge to draw out the process of pulling up the pants just so Kakashi could compliment his ass some more. Instead, he focused on the first thing Kakashi had said; he was going to keep doing this. There was a glimmer of permanency in that phrase, and Tenzou clung to it.

But he didn’t tell Kakashi that. Instead he finished getting dressed, shut off the lights, and stumbled towards the bed in the darkness. Tenzou was embarrassed at how nervous and excited he was to sleep next to Kakashi. If Kakashi had asked him why he wanted to do this, he wouldn’t have been able to explain it. Sharing a bed was just something important to him; there was a degree of intimacy and trust that came with sleeping together, in Tenzou’s inexperienced opinion. Not to mention, all their previous physical encounters had been rushed and heated. Sharing a bed was an opportunity for slow, gentle, goalless touches.

He could feel Kakashi’s body heat as he crawled under the covers and lay down. He was careful to keep a few inches of space between them; close enough to sense Kakashi’s warmth but far enough that they would only touch if Kakashi wanted them to.

Tenzou rolled on his side so he was facing Kakashi, or more accurately Kakashi’s ear, since Kakashi was still lying on his back. As his eyes adjusted to the dark, Tenzou realized that the sheet had slipped down Kakashi’s face. He could see the outline of his nose, lips, jaw, in the subtle moonlight streaming in from the slats in the window shades.

Tenzou wanted to give him a kiss goodnight, but he chewed at his own lips instead. Again, Tenzou realized he was nervous, heart beating too fast for him to fall asleep. This was nothing like their encounter in the shower or on the roof. There was no gut-fueled desire, no burning pressure. Instead, it was quiet, calm, and easy; it was the type of comfort Tenzou had spent years yearning for.

Kakashi rolled onto his side to face Tenzou and stared at him for a second before slowly reaching a hand out. Tenzou held his breath. Kakashi’s fingers spent a few moments hovering above Tenzou’s head before burying in his hair, nails scraping lightly against Tenzou’s scalp. Tenzou leaned into the touch, and when Kakashi’s hand pulled away Tenzou leaned forward to kiss him.

The kiss was wet and slow, and Tenzou still wasn’t sure what exactly he should be doing with his tongue, but Kakashi didn’t seem to mind. One of his hands rested on Tenzou’s hip, fingertips toying with the waistband of his pants but not traveling further. Tenzou unclenched his fists, although he didn’t remember ever clenching them, and wrapped one arm around Kakashi. He pulled Kakashi closer and shifted so they were chest to chest, and when they broke their kiss Kakashi pressed his face into the dip of Tenzou’s collarbone.

Tenzou could feel his own heartbeat slow to match Kakashi’s, and he took a deep breath. Kakashi’s hair smelled like dirt and sweat, but somehow Tenzou didn’t find that gross. The last time they had been this close, in the shower, everything had been hot and wet and fast, and Tenzou’s mind was hazed by how much he wanted Kakashi. But now, he could take the time to notice how Kakashi’s hair smelled, how his skin felt when Tenzou’s fingers slipped under the back of his shirt, the way Kakashi’s spine curved, the way Kakashi’s breath evened out as he began to fall asleep.

Tenzou pressed a kiss to the top of Kakashi’s head, the chapped skin of his lips catching on random strands of grey hair, and took a deep breath before closing his eyes for the night.


	6. Chapter 6

Tenzou woke slowly, one arm full of static and tingles from having slept on it, and the other one draped across a warm empty spot in the bed. Tenzou blinked, his eyes still gummy from sleep, and slowly realized that he didn’t want there to be an empty spot in the bed.

The toilet flushed in the bathroom, and Kakashi emerged shirtless and with his pajama pants low enough that Tenzou could see the trail of light grey hair running down from his belly button. Outie belly button, Tenzou noted vaguely. He smiled at Kakashi.

“One of the stewards came by about ten minutes ago, we need to head out soon.”

Tenzou buried his face in the pillow for a second, then pulled himself up into a sitting position. He could feel his hair sticking out at odd angles. Tenzou couldn’t remember the last time he had slept this well.

“I slept through someone knocking on the door?” Tenzou asked. As a ninja, that was not a good thing at all.

“He knocked very quietly,” Kakashi assured him. “I only heard him because I had just finished jerking off in the bathroom.”

Tenzou blinked some more and rubbed the gummy sleep out of his eyes. “I could have helped you with that,” he offered. He had meant for it to sound flirtatious, but he yawned halfway through.

“Nah, you were dead asleep and I’m very talented when it comes to touching myself.” Kakashi picked up Tenzou’s mission clothes, folded on the neighboring bed, and tossed them into Tenzou’s lap. “Hup hup, time to go.”

 

The Third was already waiting near the front door, accompanied by the palace guard again, when Tenzou and Kakashi arrived. His eyes were narrowed, and for a moment Tenzou was worried he somehow knew what they’d gotten up to on the roof. Sex while on missions was strictly prohibited, and Tenzou wasn’t even sure if there were political complications that came with being involved with Kakashi, who was theoretically his superior.

Was “involved” even the right word? They weren’t dating, Kakashi had made that clear.

“You’re late,” the Third said simply, and he turned to walk out the door held open by two servants. Tenzou nodded at them as he passed and breathed a sigh of relief. The Third wasn’t psychic and presumably had no way of knowing were Kakashi’s mouth had been the day prior. He wasn’t from the Yamanaka clan.

“Apologies,” Tenzou said. He knew Kakashi wouldn’t apologize, so the burden fell to him. He didn’t mind. “Any changes to our mission?”

“No, simply escort me back to Konoha, preferably in one piece. To my knowledge, there are no new threats.”

Tenzou nodded, and Kakashi walked next to him while reading a book. The palace guard walked in front of the Third, on alert. Tenzou didn’t sense anything up ahead, but he kept his guard up anyways.

There was a cool breeze just like there had been on the roof the day prior, and when Tenzou breathed deeply he could smell the trees.

The Third politely said goodbye to the guards at the gate, and Kakashi and Tenzou took over the watch. The laughter of the palace guards echoed down the trail after Tenzou, and he could feel the sound in his spine, relaxing his shoulders.

Thus far, this mission had been the best one out of all those Tenzou could remember. Stressful, yes, but nothing could compare with the calm that came with falling asleep with Kakashi against him and the loose warmth of knowing he had permission to touch him like that.

Tenzou resisted the urge to reach a hand out and card his fingers through Kakashi’s unbrushed matted hair. Maybe untangle some of the knots, but mostly to see if Kakashi would lean into his touch. His mind wandered back to the previous night. Kakashi had pressed himself against Tenzou’s chest and fallen asleep there, even after Tenzou had made it clear he didn’t want to get any more physical than literally sleeping together. He wasn’t sure if Kakashi had been so willing to let Tenzou hold him while they slept because Kakashi knew it was what Tenzou wanted, or if it was because it was something himself Kakashi wanted. Maybe a mix of the two. Either way, the thought made Tenzou bite back a grin; the way Kakashi had acted the night before meant something. Tenzou just wasn’t sure what.

There was a snapping noise, and Tenzou blinked. Kakashi had shut his book and was already pulling his headband up to uncover his sharingan.

Tenzou felt the oncoming presence a second later, when he was halfway through pulling his ANBU mask down to cover his face. The Third, a few paces ahead of them, was hunched over, his wrinkled hands holding out kunai. 

“It’s Kazue,” Kakashi said softly, quiet enough that only Tenzou could hear. Tenzou pressed his palms together in preparation for whatever jutsu he would be needing to protect the Third and, if he could manage it and if it was necessary, to protect Kakashi too.

The woods were silent, no birds or humming bugs, for another second before there was a loud crash a few yards down the trail and Kazue exploded onto the path. Her hair was wild, frizzy knots poking out from under the mask she had wrapped around her lower face. But Tenzou immediately recognized her yellowing eyes. She was probably sick, he realized. She had also tried to kill him and Kakashi.

A one-armed ninja rolled out of the trees and landed on the trail with as much precision and balance as could be reasonably expected from someone who recently had a limb amputated.

Tenzou blinked and felt his chest momentarily tighten, his ribs crushing his lungs and squeezing his heart. Miwa was back in the field. Months too soon. Her balance was still shot, and Tenzou was willing to bet she wasn’t accustomed to fighting one-armed yet.

Kazue froze where she stood, with Miwa standing at her back, chakra knuckles winking in the warm sun, and Kakashi, Tenzou, and the Third before her. Kazue blinked and pointed at Kakashi, finger shaking with what was either rage, adrenaline, or fatigue. Tenzou wasn’t sure.

“I thought you killed her,” Kakashi said before Kazue had a chance to say anything. Out of the corner of his eye, Tenzou could see Kakashi glance in his direction. Tenzou kept his eyes trained on Kazue.

“No, I just buried her and crossed my fingers,” Tenzou clarified. Kakashi made a soft humming noise and nodded.

“You did more than bury me,” Kazue shouted. Louder than necessary considering how close she was do them, Tenzou noticed. Definitely rage. “You caved in our entire operation. I was nearly crushed. Orochimaru blamed me. He said I’m not even worth expending the effort necessary to kill me.” Kazue lowered her mask momentarily to spit at them. The few teeth she had left were black and rotting. Definitely sick.

Leaves rustled in one of the trees above and Tenzou looked up. An ANBU was crouched in the uppermost branches, mask splattered with blood and mud and long black hair tangling in the wind. Tenzou nodded at her and Yugao nodded back. Blood was steadily streaming down from a stab on her bicep.

Kazue pointed a finger at Kakashi. “You. Fight me.”

Kakashi shrugged. “Sure.”

Kazue hadn’t fought Kakashi in peak condition before, Tenzou realized. He was the son of the White Fang, student of the Yellow Flash, and a legend by his own right. Tenzou took a step back and nodded to Kakashi. “I’ll stay out of this unless you need me to.”

The Third groaned behind them. “Just get on with this and finish her off.”

Yugao was still in the trees, watching. Everything was silent for a single second before Kakashi darted forwards, kunai in hand and sharingan out. Kazue was a step behind him, her scroll out and barely beginning to weave signs, and she couldn’t match his speed. Kakashi’s kunai slammed into her chest and blood spurted out only to be replaced with smoke.

A shadow clone.

The Third coughed. “I’m disappointed that you couldn’t tell that wasn’t really her.”

Kakashi’s knee ground into the patch of dirt where Kazue had been standing and he picked up his kunai. “She’s dangerous. Sick and desperate.”

Tenzou nodded. “I’m betting that she was working with Orochimaru in the hopes he could heal her.”

Kakashi stood and moved to stand next to Tenzou. “Well, if that’s the case, she picked the wrong Legendary Sanin to get help from.” Tenzou nodded, even though he wasn’t exactly positive which other Legendary Sannin Kakashi was referring to. Probably Tsunade, but no one had seen her in decades.

Yugao dropped out of the tree and wobbled towards where the Third, Kakashi, and Tenzou were grouped. After a moment’s hesitation, Miwa wrapped her arm around Yugao’s waist to steady her.

“What would you like us to do?” Kakashi asked.

Yugao’s arm was still bleeding profusely and there were no signs of the slice clotting. It looked deep.

“We fought her earlier, the real her. I’m not sure when she switched out for a shadow clone,” Miwa said.

Yugao nodded. “She was taking risks no sensible ninja would take, so I’m not sure what her state of mind is. But even with some erratic fighting, she managed to get me good. I think the blade was coated with an anticoagulant.” Yugao pressed her palm against her bicep and it only took a moment for blood to start leaking out between her fingers.

Miwa wordlessly touched her fingertips to the stump remaining from her lost arm.

The Third closed his eyes in thought for a moment, and Yamato scanned the area. Everything felt like a perfect coincidence. Kazue had been tracking them from enough distance they didn’t detect her. Yugao and Miwa were somehow alerted to her presence before he or Kakashi noticed her, and they intercepted her only for them to practically crash into the Third’s envoy.

“You chose Kakashi and me to escort you so we could lure her out,” Tenzou said bluntly. The Third didn’t open his eyes. Miwa and Yugao froze where they were standing, and Miwa bit her lip.

“Sounds about right,” Kakashi mumbled. “You should have just been straightforward with us though.”

“I don’t have to explain myself to you.” The Third took a deep breath, then went on, “If you knew Kazue was seeking you out, you’d have tried to find her while I was meeting with the Feudal Lord, so I thought it was best to keep you in the dark.”

“Honestly, I had better things to do,” Kakashi replied. Tenzou tried to pretend he wasn’t blushing, but nobody was looking his way anyway.

The Third straightened his back and cleared his throat. “Kakashi and Miwa, follow Kazue’s trail and dispose of her. Bring back proof of death if possible. Go. Tenzou will escort me back to Konoha. Yugao will return with us to receive medical attention.”

Tenzou opened his mouth to complain, but the Third continued, “Yugao must return to Konoha and Miwa must go after Kazue because she has the most recent information on her activities. Kakashi must also go because that will help lure Kazue out into an open confrontation. Again, I don’t have to explain my decisions to you. Kazue is dangerous and may have other associates, try to find her and neutralize her before she contacts them.”

Kakashi stopped slouching and cracked his back, shoulders shifting and spine twisting, popping. Miwa worked her chakra knuckles off and pinned them under her chin before pressing her fist into the hard bone of her hip, cracking her knuckles.

Kazue was dangerous, the Third was right. They had been sent to assassinate her for a reason, and she’d been able to take down Kakashi. That was an impressive feat, even when his exhaustion was taken into account.

Tenzou closed his eyes for a moment and slapped his hands together into a series of seals before clearing his throat.

He opened his eyes and held out his hands to Miwa and Kakashi. “These are tracking seeds. Within a certain range, I’ll be able to sense your movements. It’s not much, but if you’re within my range I might be able to tell if you need help.”

Kakashi’s fingertips grazed the skin of Tenzou’s palm as he picked up the seed, the pads of his fingers and nails lingering a split second longer than necessary. By the time Tenzou had looked up to meet Kakashi’s gaze, Kakashi had already looked away. There had probably been something significant in Kakashi’s expression, had Tenzou been able to catch a glimpse.

“Where do we put them? Should we swallow them?” Miwa asked, squinting at the pale seed pinched between her thumb and forefinger. Tenzou hadn’t even noticed her taking the seed.

“No, wedge them into the tread of your sandals. If you’re searched, they won’t be found,” Tenzou answered. Miwa leaned against a tree to shove the seed into the heel of her sandal; she still didn’t have enough balance to handle standing on one foot unaided.

Kakashi placed his seed and stomped his foot on the ground twice for good measure, then took a few step forwards to clap Tenzou on the shoulder.

“See you,” Kakashi said, and then his hand was gone and he had vanished into the woods, Miwa close behind.

Tenzou dug his nails into his palm and turned to follow Yugao and the Third towards Konoha.


	7. Chapter 7

Three days after returning to Konoha, Tenzou let himself into Kakashi’s apartment to water his plant. Kakashi had never reclaimed his key, but Tenzou still felt like it was an invasion of privacy. So just like before, Tenzou only stayed for a few moments.

Tenzou vaguely wished he had spent more time creating ways to extend his tracking range while younger; within half a day of their departure, Kakashi and Miwa had traveled outside his range. He wished he’d differentiated between Kakashi and Miwa’s seeds, wished he’d figured out some way to track their vitals. Tenzou wished a lot of things.

 

A week after returning to Konoha, Yugao was back at her post as ANBU captain. Tenzou was in Kakashi’s apartment again, doing dishes, watering Kakashi’s tree, and doing laundry. Kakashi would probably be confused when he came back, but Tenzou needed to do something with his hands other than twiddling his thumbs. There weren’t many ANBU missions available, and Yugao was offering them to other ninjas. Tenzou wasn’t sure if Yugao was trying to give him a break or if he was just paranoid.

 

Two weeks after returning to Konoha, Tenzou lay on his back on Kakashi’s bed, allowing his mind to create patterns out of the imperfections in the ceiling. Man-made constellations to replace the ones he couldn’t see in the light-polluted sky. The bed was made, and Tenzou honestly couldn’t remember if he’d found it that way or if he’d unconsciously fixed it a day or two before. Probably the latter, if Tenzou were to be honest with himself.

The blankets weren’t washed though, Tenzou had decided that was too intrusive. Washing dishes and organizing the haphazard stacks of ANBU files felt acceptable, but beds were different; Kakashi let his guard down and slept. Tenzou was pretty sure there would be some unspoken trust violated if he were to wash Kakashi’s sheets, even though there were some suspicious stains. He’d already pushed the envelope by straightening the bed in the first place.

He was definitely over analyzing things, Tenzou decided, so he retreated to his own room to take a unintrusive nap in his own bed, where there were fewer implications.

Tenzou’s room was the same size as Kakashi’s, but instead of a table and kitchenette and bookcases there were two more beds. Everything was the same shade of light wood, from the walls to the floorboards to the bed frames themselves. There were no roommates around at the moment, so Tenzou curled up on his bed without changing into pajamas. Tenzou’s stomach ached with a mixture of confusion and intimacy and intrusion and worry, so he rolled over and buried his face in a pillow and fell asleep.

 

There was a sudden tug on the corner of Tenzou’s consciousness, small but enough to make him sit up and focus. It was one of his tracking seeds, edging back into his range of detection.

“Good afternoon, sleepyhead,” somebody said, and Tenzou recognized one of his new roommates after he rubbed the sleep from his eyes. The guy was picking blood out of the cuticles of his toenails with a toothpick, and with a passing pang of guilt Tenzou realized he didn’t remember the guy’s name. Everything had been too busy the past few weeks, too confusing, too stressful, too Kakashi. All he could think to do was shake his head and focus on the tracking seeds.

There was only one seed though, and after a few minutes a second didn’t enter his sensory range. The seed he could sense was moving slowly, stopping frequently for a moment or two before continuing on. The pauses were rhythmic enough that Tenzou was fairly sure they weren’t being followed; rather they were pausing because of fatigue or injury.

Tenzou paced the room, his bare feet warming the smooth floorboards. Kakashi had probably paced in his own room before as well, Tenzou decided. He knew Kakashi had nervous habits, like fiddling with those bells or chewing at the inside of his mask. Tenzou hoped that Kakashi was indulging in a nervous habit, not incapacitated.

 

When the seed was just a day’s journey from Konoha, Tenzou started sitting on the roofs and walls of Konoha, watching for a signal. He’d sent a message to the Third ( _One of them is returning from the mission, but only one. No sign of the second tracking seed, but potentially signs of duress from the first. I’m concerned and respectfully ask permission to rendezvous with them as a precaution._ ), but the response he received from the Third’s secretary was more succinct than he’d hoped for ( _You are to remain in Konoha on standby in preparation for another mission_ ). So he was left waiting and fidgeting and trying to convince the officially-stationed guards that he was there just because he was bored. 

Tenzou didn’t even try to lie to himself; he knew that he was nervous. He also knew that his nervousness was unfounded. Kakashi was one of the best--if not the best--ninja to come out of Konoha within the last two decades. But even with that knowledge, Tenzou worried. He wondered if he would ever stop worrying. Maybe that was what it meant to care about somebody.

Tenzou spent the last two hours before the arrival of the seed-bearer standing on the lip of the wall, eyes unceasingly scanning the horizon and the treeline for anything. The darkness was beginning to set in, but Tenzou’s eyes adjusted easily enough.

Then, a bowed figure appeared. They were slumped under the weight of whatever they were carrying across their shoulders. A body, if Tenzou were to guess. He didn’t want to guess.

As the figure came closer, Tenzou recognized Kakashi’s messy mop of grey hair, illuminated by the early moonlight. He closed his eyes and savored the cool rush of relief before the shame started burning through his ligaments and veins. Kakashi had made it back alive; he wasn’t as sure about Miwa.

When Kakashi was close enough to the gates that Tenzou could see the streaks of blood and dirt in his hair, Tenzou jumped off the wall onto a roof and bounded towards the gate. His sandals crunched into roofing tiles with each leap to the next building until finally, finally he landed at the gates before Kotetsu and Izumo’s guard desk. Kotetsu was sleeping, and Izumo was already turning the crank to open the gates.

“You the welcoming party?” Izumo asked. He was grinning. He hadn’t seen what was approaching the gates. Most likely all he knew was that the wall guards had signaled for him to open the gate.

Tenzou didn’t grin back.

The gates cracked apart and Kakashi slipped in before they had finished opening. Under the sulfuric light of the street lamp, Tenzou could see Miwa’s shape pressed against Kakashi’s bowed back. His arms were holding her up awkwardly, and as Kakashi moved past Tenzou, it became clear why; one of Miwa’s legs was gone, sliced away just above the knee. Same side of her body as the arm she’d lost, leaving her lopsided.

Tenzou fell into step next to Kakashi. He was probably heading to the hospital, but when Tenzou reached a hand out to touch Miwa’s shoulder, he confirmed that it was no use. Her skin was paper thin and just as pale; he could see the map of her veins under her skin, but the blood was missing. It had all pooled at the rough stump where her leg belonged. Her face was pressed against Kakashi’s neck, and Tenzou was thankful he couldn’t see her expression.

Wordlessly, Kakashi continued carrying her body to the hospital, and Tenzou walked with him, assessing the damage. Her stump was blackened and bark-like and, were Tenzou to touch it, probably hard. He didn’t want to touch it. After a moment of staring, Tenzou realized that Kakashi had tried to stop the bleeding by cauterizing her wounds.

Her last few moments must have been hell. At least, Tenzou hoped it was only moments. More likely it was hours.

“I can carry her,” Tenzou offered softly.

Kakashi huffed and shifted Miwa on his back. “I carried her this far, I can do a little bit more.”

Tenzou nodded, and moved his hand from Miwa’s shoulder to Kakashi’s. Warm, slick with sweat, and definitely alive.

They walked the rest of the way in silence, stopping every twenty paces or so for Kakashi to take a deep breath and shift.

 

Izumo had already sent word to the hospital that a gurney would be needed, so one was wheeled out front by the time they reached the front doors. The gurney was flanked nurses and medics, but Kakashi didn’t glance at them. He deposited Miwa onto the gurney’s thin mattress, straightened his back momentarily to crack his spine, and then began to slouch off in the direction of the ANBU barracks. He didn’t flinch at the sickeningly solid sound Miwa’s body made as she landed and he didn’t respond to the nurses asking him questions.

He simply walked away, and Tenzou followed.

 

“I’ve got to write my report,” Kakashi said; the first words he had spoken since they left Miwa’s body at the hospital.

Tenzou stood in the doorway of Kakashi’s apartment and shifted his weight from foot to foot. His fingers fidgeted against the door knob. Tenzou didn’t bother glancing around the apartment, since everything was still exactly how he had left it.

Kakashi yanked his vest off, zipper snapping apart and buttons popping, and threw it on the floor to flake dried blood onto the hardwood. Tenzou watched the motion and stared at the bloody vest on the floor until Kakashi said, “close the door.”

Fatigue racked his voice, turning the words soft and flat. Tenzou stepped the rest of the way inside and toed his sandals off before easing the door onto its latch. He locked the door as well, but his fingers hesitated as he did so.

Once the door was shut Kakashi started stripping off the rest of his clothes, tossing his gloves and undershirt--built-in mask and all--into the same pile as his vest. Tenzou looked away from the clothes and glanced at Kakashi. His skin looked nearly as thin as Miwa’s had, except the web-thin veins were still pumping blood. Kakashi’s muscles were more fragile than Tenzou remembered them being, straining under pale skin as he stretched. The cracking and popping of his bones and joints sounded dangerously similar to breaking and snapping.

Mostly, Kakashi looked small.

Kakashi started undoing his pants and Tenzou looked back down to the pile of clothes. This was a new type of intimacy, one that left Tenzou feeling breathless like he’d been punched in the gut.

Kakashi snapped his fingers and Tenzou blinked. A pair of pants had joined the pile Tenzou was staring at. After a moment of considering, Tenzou decided it was best to give Kakashi some semblance of privacy and continue staring at the pile.

Kakashi snapped his fingers once more. “Pants, out of the nightstand drawer.”

Tenzou caught a guilty glimpse of flesh as he stepped away from the threshold and towards Kakashi’s bed. His eyes lingered momentarily on the photographs he had investigated what felt like years ago. It hadn’t been years. Three months, if that.

Tenzou blindly grabbed a pair of pants out of the drawer and tossed them over his shoulder in Kakashi’s direction.

“Nice, my favorite pair,” Kakashi said. His voice was still toneless.

Tenzou waited until the sound of rustling fabric had faded before turning away from the photographs on the nightstand.

Kakashi was shirtless and wearing yellow pajama pants covered in pink paw prints. Tenzou blinked. “Favorite pair?”

“Favorite pair,” Kakashi reassured him. His voice sounded less breakable, but there was still a fragility that made Tenzou’s skin feel too tight.

Kakashi sat down at his table and picked up a pencil. Now that Tenzou had organized his stacks of mission files, there was room to sit. However, Kakashi didn’t say anything. 

Tenzou stood in the corner of the room and watched Kakashi for a moment--the heavy sag of his shoulders, the stiff curve of his spine--before sitting down at the center of Kakashi’s bed, the springs squeaking under his weight.

He had probably become more familiar with Kakashi’s bed than was appropriate, but for the moment Tenzou didn’t really care. He scanned the titles of the books in Kakashi’s haphazard bookcase and vaguely brainstormed more effective organization.

The scratching of Kakashi’s pencil against the report paper steadily became sharper and louder, and Tenzou glanced in time to see the pencil snap in two. Kakashi stared at his hand for a moment, then down at the two pencil halves, before picking up the tiny half with the pencil lead and writing again.

Tenzou went back to staring blankly at the bookcase before him, and the pencil didn’t snap again. Kakashi’s scribblings were lighter and slower, but still just as sharp.

After a few minutes Kakashi stood up and threw the mission folder onto a stack of personnel files that Tenzou had organized the day prior. Kakashi yawned, cracked his back again, and then slouched over to the refrigerator. 

Tenzou looked down at his feet. Dirt was trapped in the cuticles of his toes and under each nail. That was just from running around on rooftops; Kakashi’s were probably significantly dirtier. They likely had flaky mud trapped between his toes, blood splattered down his Achilles’ tendon.

Before Tenzou had a chance to check, Kakashi sat down at the edge of his bed, slightly diagonal from Tenzou. Something glass clinked as Kakashi shifted until his right hip was pressing against Tenzou’s left knee.

“I’m gonna drink,” Kakashi said flatly, “you can drink with me if you want.” Kakashi held out a bottle of beer and Tenzou took it, the glass cold and wet against his palm and Kakashi’s fingers warm and rough.

The touch lingered for a second, so when Kakashi moved his hand away Tenzou leaned forward and pressed his forehead against Kakashi’s bare shoulder. Instead of jerking or moving away, as Tenzou was prepared for, Kakashi lightly pressed his shoulder back against Tenzou and sighed. The sigh was just a small exhalation of breath against the beer bottle before Kakashi took a swig, but Tenzou heard it nonetheless.

Tenzou opened his beer and tossed the cap in the general direction of the trash can. It hit the floor and bounced a good three feet away from its target, but Tenzou didn’t get up to properly throw it away. Instead, he watched the rise and fall of Kakashi’s spine and hated himself a bit because Miwa had just died and all he could think about was how glad he was to have Kakashi next to him.

He drank half the bottle in one go. It was sharp and bitter, and a quick glance at the label told Tenzou it was the cheap shit.

Kakashi started mumbling, and it took Tenzou a second to find and start following Kakashi’s words. “...shouldn’t have encouraged her to stay in ANBU. She should have gotten out while she could and lived a one-armed civilian life.”

Tenzou shifted. Kakashi generally didn’t talk about things like emotions and regrets, so he wasn’t completely sure what to say.

“She would have done it anyways, you know that,” Tenzou offered after a moment, “and I definitely helped convince her too.”

Kakashi shrugged. “Everyone dies in this profession at one point or another, just a question of when.” He took a long chug of his beer. “They get you when you’re young and stupid, strong and cocky, or old and slow.”

Kakashi had already finished his bottle and got up for another one. Tenzou wasn’t sure when Kakashi had eaten last, but Tenzou also wasn’t quite sure when he had last eaten either.

Kakashi sat back down on the bed with two beers in hand, this time away from the edge and right next to Tenzou, shoulders pressing. He stretched his legs out and wiggled his toes. Tenzou noticed that he’d been right about there being blood splattered on Kakashi’s heel.

“How are you not done with yours?” Kakashi mumbled, “our goal tonight is to get drunk enough that things don’t matter anymore.”

“Didn’t realize that was the goal,” Tenzou said. He finished the last of the bottle and grimaced at the taste while Kakashi took the bottle away. He could hear it clunk onto the floor.

“Definitely the goal,” Kakashi assured him. He used his teeth to pop the cap off his own new bottle, and Tenzou forced it off using his thumb.

Before Tenzou could take a drink, Kakashi bumped their bottles together. Beer sloshed out of Kakashi’s and spilled onto his hand.

“To Miwa,” Kakashi said. Tenzou watched Kakashi’s tongue glide up his knuckles as he licked off the beer.

“To Miwa,” Tenzou finally hummed. He closed his eyes and took a drink.

Kakashi shifted until his knobby spine was leaning against Tenzou’s shoulder while Tenzou tried to think of something to say. Once he settled against Tenzou, Kakashi seemed to be comfortable with the silence. Tenzou wasn’t. There were words digging up his throat and biting into his tonsils and he tried to focus on identifying them.

“I was worried about you,” Tenzou finally settled on. Kakashi made a humming noise and continued drinking, so Tenzou continued, “I knew you could take on Kazue, she only got the drop on you last time because you were drained, but--”

Kakashi hummed again for a second, then said, “stop.”

But Tenzou couldn’t find the brakes, or potentially didn’t even want to, and he kept talking. “But this time I felt like something was wrong. She seemed unstable but even Yugao hadn’t been able to take her down. Did she have an ambush set up?”

“Stop,” Kakashi said again. His voice still had a bit of a hum to it, maybe because he’d just finished his second beer in ten minutes on a presumably empty stomach. This time, Tenzou stopped talking.

Kakashi took a deep breath and sat up, the warmth of his spine retreating and leaving Tenzou with just the ghostings of his presence.

Tenzou looked down at the bottle of beer in his hand and swirled it around a bit before taking another drink. He should probably leave, he realized, but his limbs were heavy and somehow this had become just like the night at the Feudal Lord’s palace where things were off kilter and confusing, only this time it was worse. He needed to stay until things were balanced out again.

The bedsprings creaked while Kakashi shifted around, but Tenzou continued looking down at his beer.

“Tenzou,” Kakashi said simply. His voice didn’t have the tipsy hum anymore. Kakashi had turned to face him, and Tenzou blinked for a few seconds before Kakashi started speaking again. “Yes, there was an ambush. I think they were some of the ones from Orochimaru’s hideout. They’re dead, I got out with some chakra exhaustion, Miwa got out with two out of three remaining limbs. I didn’t have the chakra to summon Pakkun long enough for him to help. She died, I brought her body home because she asked me to. And now we’re here.”

Tenzou chewed his lip for a moment. “I should have been the one to go with you. I’d fought Kazue before, at least sort of, and I’m more seasoned than Miwa. She shouldn’t have even been back on the field. Whoever let her back on was irresponsible.”

“You’re right.” Kakashi’s gaze was unfocused, but Tenzou was pretty sure Kakashi was trying to maintain eye contact. His left eyelid, the one covering his sharingan, was drooping more than usual. This close, Tenzou could see the dark circles under Kakashi’s eyes, the little flecks of blood that had splattered the corner of his face he left uncovered. Tenzou wanted to reach out and wipe the blood away, even though by this point it had dried into the lines and crevices of Kakashi’s skin.

Kakashi took a breath and blinked slowly. “You’re right, you should have been there. But you weren’t, and now that kid is dead, and it’s not your fault. It’s mine. So don’t try to shoulder the blame, it’s not yours to carry.”

“It’s not your fault either. You did everything you could to save her, I can tell.” The bitter beer had made his throat sore, so Tenzou talked quietly. “Don’t blame yourself.”

Kakashi closed his eye and Tenzou could see his shoulders twitch; a silent laugh, Tenzou realized after a second. “Associating with me is a death sentence. Honestly, you should keep your distance.”

Tenzou stopped resisting the urge to touch him and reached out to graze his fingertips along the side of Kakashi’s face. Kakashi leaned into the touch, so Tenzou didn’t stop. Instead he ran his fingers down Kakashi’s jaw until his palm came to rest against Kakashi’s pulse point. Warm, steady, soft. Kakashi didn’t try to pull away.

“You think I’ve never had the people around me die?” Tenzou asked.

Kakashi’s eyes were still closed, and he took a deep breath. Tenzou could feel the shift of his skin and muscles under the palm of his hand.

“Everybody I’ve ever cared about is dead.” Kakashi opened his good eye and stared at something over Tenzou’s shoulder. The framed pictures on his dresser.

“Rin’s not dead,” Tenzou said. His fingertips grazed the edge of Kakashi’s hair.

“Nearly killed her though. It’s the reason she went off active duty.”

“Guy’s not dead.”

“And the list pretty much ends there, doesn’t it?”

“I’m not dead,” Tenzou offered. Things were feeling fuzzy at the edges, and Tenzou realized he was definitely at the point of tipsy. The blood in his veins moved sluggishly and the seconds dragged by in a warm haze. He didn’t mind. Things still felt off kilter, but somehow talking was pulling things back into balance.

“You’re not dead,” Kakashi agreed. “But you probably will be if you stick around.” He closed his eye and Tenzou rubbed the flesh of Kakashi’s neck with his thumb. His skin felt thin, like a single swipe of Tenzou’s nail could slice it.

“I could say the same,” Tenzou hummed. “You’ve read my file, haven’t you?”

Kakashi didn’t open his eye, but his shoulders raised a few centimeters in acknowledgement. A shrug. He’d never read the file, Tenzou realized.

“I’m one of Orochimaru’s experiments,” Tenzou whispered. The words were heavy on his lips; he’d never said aloud them before.

“I figured. It’s not like we’ve got a thriving clan of Hashirama’s descendants here, and Orochimaru loves to play with eugenics,” Kakashi replied. His skin felt warmer than it had moments before, his complexion redder. He was shifting away from pleasantly buzzed to actually drunk, Tenzou figured, even though he wasn’t slurring his words.

“I watched them all die. I was the only one that lived. My first years that was all I did. Watch other children die while waiting for my turn. I know what it’s like, Kakashi.”

Kakashi shifted forward, the heel of Tenzou’s palm running into Kakashi’s hairline, and pressed his face into the crook of Tenzou’s neck.

“I don’t like talking about this,” Kakashi said. Tenzou could feel Kakashi’s voice rattle his own chest. “Can we do something that’s not as depressing?”

Tenzou wrapped his arm around Kakashi in a loose hug and breathed into his hair. There was blood soaked into the tangles and he smelled of sweat and grime.

“I go get us food, you go take a shower if you want?” Tenzou suggested. “We’re going to have massive hangovers if we don’t eat.”

Kakashi shifted closer to Tenzou. He rested one of his palms on Tenzou’s thigh. “Why don’t we make out instead?”

Tenzou felt the words on his skin, through the fabric of his high-necked shirt, and they made his breath catch on his ribs.

“Feels kind of like a disservice to Miwa,” Tenzou said slowly. He tightened his arm around Kakashi though and took another deep breath against Kakashi’s scalp.

“No, she totally would want us to make out. It was her dying wish, in fact. She told me that she didn’t want her death to make me sad, so she wanted us to make out and for you to maybe put a finger up my ass or something.”

“That’s terrible,” Tenzou hissed.

“No it’s not, in fact fingering is really fun. I verified this through extensive research.”

Tenzou snorted and closed his eyes. Kakashi was warm and alive, breathing into the fabric of his shirt. Time felt slow. The room was steady, although Tenzou was fairly certain that feeling would go away if he stood up. Most of all, they were deep in the walls of Konoha and they were alone; Tenzou felt safe. It’s not an emotion Tenzou was used to, and one that he knew he shouldn’t crave. But still, it was there. “Okay, let’s make out. I don’t know about the butt stuff though.”

“We can decide about the butt stuff later,” Kakashi offered, and in a couple unsteady movements he hauled himself into Tenzou’s lap, one leg on either side of Tenzou’s hips. Tenzou wasn’t sure what to do with his hands so he settled them on Kakashi’s thighs, gripping the fabric of Kakashi’s pajama pants between his fingers.

Kakashi leaned forward and Tenzou tilted his head in preparation for the oncoming kiss; he’d figured out at least that much. But instead he felt Kakashi’s hands gently inch up his biceps before resting on his shoulders and Kakashi’s forehead against his own. This close, he could see that Kakashi’s eyelashes were the same whitish grey as the rest of his hair. Kakashi’s breath warmed Tenzou’s face, and he felt Kakashi’s fingers slide from his shoulders into his hair. Kakashi’s nails lightly scraped his scalp, so Tenzou shut his eyes and waited the few seconds for Kakashi to kiss him.

Kakashi’s mouth tasted like the cheap beer and he started slower than Tenzou was used to, his nails carding through the hair at the nape of Tenzou’s neck and occasionally venturing to his jaw. The light touches made Tenzou shiver; the beer made it hard to focus, and the kisses were not helping. Tenzou didn’t mind though, so he slid his hands up Kakashi’s thighs until they came to the waistband of his pajama pants. His thumbs rubbed gentle circles against the hard jut of Kakashi’s hipbones because he’d enjoyed that when Kakashi did it and hoped returning the favor would be welcome. Kakashi proved Tenzou right by thrusting forward into the touch and moving his hands down to the zipper of Tenzou’s flak vest. With minimal coordination, he helped Kakashi pull it off.

They had to separate to pull Tenzou’s shirt over his head, but as soon as Kakashi had thrown it to the side his mouth was on Tenzou’s jaw and his hands splayed across Tenzou’s ribs. This kisses were harder now with more tongue and teeth scraping along Tenzou’s bottom lip. Meanwhile Tenzou’s fingertips were exploring the dips and curves of muscle and scars across Kakashi’s back.

Kakashi moved to the soft vulnerable spot behind Tenzou’s ear and his hands started running down Tenzou’s chest, fingers and nails lingering in the places that made Tenzou’s breath catch.

Kakashi started kissing Tenzou on the mouth again when his fingers reached the sensitive skin at the edge of Tenzou’s pants. The kiss was wetter and sloppier and Tenzou didn’t realize that his hands had slid down to Kakashi’s ass until Kakashi’s arms were wrapped around his shoulders and Kakashi ground down hard against him.

Tenzou gripped Kakashi’s ass and grazed his teeth against Kakashi’s lips and a quiet part of Tenzou wanted to lay Kakashi down on the bed and kiss him and touch him into oblivion and give Kakashi the best orgasm of his life, one that left him shaking and breathless. He wanted to hear Kakashi moan his name like he’d never moaned anybody’s name before. Tenzou didn’t do that, though, because Kakashi seemed to be enjoying himself at the moment and because Tenzou was okay with just kissing and gently touching for eternity.

Tenzou could feel Kakashi’s cock getting harder as he rolled his hips and pressed against Tenzou. His fingernails started digging into Tenzou’s shoulder blades and he made noises between kisses that made Tenzou kiss him harder.

And then Kakashi stopped rocking against Tenzou and pulled his mouth just far enough away to catch his breath. Tenzou could see every detail of Kakashi’s irises at this distance.

“I’m feeling a little alone at this party. Why am I the only one that’s hard?” Kakashi asked, breath skating across Tenzou’s lips as he talked. It took Tenzou a few moments of blinking and squinting to understand.

He was, indeed, not hard. Tenzou swallowed. For him, this was one of the perils of drinking. “Too much beer on an empty stomach.”

Kakashi kissed Tenzou again, closed lips brushing, and said “so you’ve got yourself a case of whiskydick.”

Tenzou looked down at his and Kakashi’s groins and noted the marked differences in degrees of excitement. “Yeah, yeah you could say that.”

Kakashi buried his face in Tenzou’s shoulder and groaned into his collarbones. “I wanted to have sex, I wanted to have orgasms, I wanted tonight to be fun.”

Everything still felt warm and slow for Tenzou, so he rubbed his hands up and down Kakashi’s back and tried to think of a solution. Sex wasn’t at the forefront of his mind, but Kakashi having fun was. If Kakashi wanted to cum, Tenzou wanted to be the one to make that happen. “I could go and get us food. That’ll sober me up, maybe I could get hard then.”

Kakashi rolled off him and crossed his arms. “That’ll work. I guess. I’ll just, I don’t know, jerk off by myself. Not the mediocre end to a shitty day I wanted, but hey, what’s the alternative.”

Tenzou slowly got to his feet and closed his eyes while the room finished wobbling. “You know, you’re kinda demand-y when you’re a little bit drunk.”

Kakashi shrugged. “I like getting off, especially when I have assistance.”

Tenzou nodded and fished his shirt off the floor. “Good point. I’m gonna. Food, I’m gonna get us food, and then I’m gonna get you an orgasm. Somehow, but it’s gonna happen. I promise.”

 

Tenzou took longer to get their ramen than he’d planned. First the ramen place had moved about three blocks away from where it was supposed to be according to his admittedly befuddled memory, and the menu items wouldn’t stop wiggling around once he got there. He definitely needed the food. And water. Tenzou bought some non-alcoholic bottles of water along with the ramen, in part because he’d forgotten Kakashi’s apartment did indeed have running water.

Kakashi was still sitting on his bed when Tenzou returned. His hard-on was gone and Tenzou could tell he was disappointed about that fact.

“Table’s a mess, we eat in bed,” Kakashi decided.

Tenzou furrowed his eyebrows. “But I cleaned the table up for you. We could definitely eat there like normal adults.”

Kakashi groaned in the same tone he’d used when he first discovered his plans for the night were derailed. “Yeah, but the table’s over there and I’m over here.”

Tenzou didn’t find a flaw in that logic, so he and Kakashi proceeded to eat as much ramen and as many steamed buns as they could without throwing up. Tenzou dropped all his mushrooms into Kakashi’s bowl and Kakashi did not mind in the least.

“So. Getting off. Is your dick capable of doing some work?” Kakashi asked with his last bite of food in his mouth. A dribble of sauce had made its way down to his chin and there was a piece of rice stuck to his lips. Tenzou wiped the mess away with the back of his hand and Kakashi took the opportunity to lick Tenzou’s wrist.

Tenzou tried to think of how Kakashi’s tongue felt on his wrist, how it would feel against his collarbones, chest, stomach, hips, thighs. He thought about Kakashi moaning into his neck and thought about Kakashi’s ass. Nothing. He thought back to the night in the showers and the blowjob on the roof. Still nothing.

Tenzou politely swallowed his food before answering. “We can try, but even though I’m sobering up a bit, I don’t think so.”

Kakashi dropped his chopsticks into the emptied takeout container with a bigger flourish than necessary.

“Hey, that doesn’t mean you can’t get off,” Tenzou pointed out.

“Yeah, it’s true.” Kakashi’s lower lip stuck out more than usual. Tenzou was fairly certain he would have noticed an underbite at some point in his close encounters with Kakashi’s mouth; after a moment he realized Kakashi was pouting.

“I didn’t mean that you had to get off unassisted.” Tenzou started scooping all the trash into the plastic bag he’d brought the food in. “I mean, if you’re okay with me touching you like that, I would like to touch you like that.”

Kakashi snorted and his shoulders heaved in silent laughter. “Listen to yourself, you sound like such a virgin.”

Tenzou fiddled with his chopsticks for a second. He had forgotten, probably because he still felt pretty tipsy, about how much more experienced Kakashi was. He had been speaking in what were to him simple terms of desire; to Kakashi it sounded pedestrian and immature.

“Hey. Hey.” Kakashi waved his hand in front of Tenzou’s face to get his attention. “There’s nothing wrong with that. But yes, I do want you to touch me like that.”

Tenzou smiled down at his chopsticks before tossing them to the side and reaching for Kakashi. He was still shirtless so Tenzou didn’t have any clothing to grip to pull him closer. Instead he came to Kakashi, his hands seeking out the smooth planes of Kakashi’s waist and lips making sloppy contact with Kakashi’s chin.

Kakashi’s first reaction was to laugh, which only made Tenzou want to touch him and hold him and kiss him more. Kakashi corrected Tenzou’s kiss angle and Tenzou lost a few moments focusing on just Kakashi’s lips.

Kakashi’s fingers went immediately to the edge of Tenzou’s shirt and started tugging it up, his hands brushing up Tenzou’s stomach and making his belly button tickle. Tenzou broke away to rip his shirt off over his head and as soon as that was gone Kakashi grabbed Tenzou’s hands and pulled them onto his ass.

“I didn’t get off while you were getting food, I fucking waited,” Kakashi hissed against Tenzou’s bare neck. He kissed the skin just under Tenzou’s chin and sucked hard for a second. Tenzou’s grip on Kakashi’s ass immediately tightened. “I don’t really want to wait much more. I want me to get off, and for you to get off too if that’s an option.”

“I’m not sure it’s an option,” Tenzou admitted. The fact that Kakashi’s mouth was making his heart pound and adrenaline hiss through his veins only for the pressure of arousal to dull right past his hips was maddening.

“Let’s get rid of your pants and find out.”

Tenzou liked Kakashi’s suggestion so he stumbled off of the bed and hobbled around a bit while struggling to get out of his clothes. By the time Tenzou turned back around wearing nothing but a smile, Kakashi had wiggled out of his pajama pants and was laying back on the bed, naked and clearly already getting turned on.

Tenzou licked his lips and took a moment to stare. This was the first time he’d had permission to look; in the showers everything had been fast and all the glances guilty, but this time he let his gaze linger. Kakashi was a gangly man, Tenzou had always known this, but stretched out like this Tenzou could see the elegant lines and muscles of Kakashi’s shoulders and biceps, the gentle sloping curves of his hips, the soft flesh of his thighs.

“Are we just going to stare at each other, or can we actually--as you say--touch each other?” Kakashi asked. Tenzou blinked for a moment. Kakashi had been eyeing him as well, Tenzou realized, and he suddenly felt a flood of embarrassment. He glanced down at his cock, but it was still flaccid and boring.

When Tenzou looked back up, however, Kakashi was not staring at his sad cock and instead his good eye was trained on Tenzou’s face.

“You’re not mad at me for this whole,” Tenzou waved his hand around a bit, “whiskydick situation?”

Kakashi scoffed and patted the bed. “Mildly disappointed, yes, but not mad. Honestly you should be the angry one because this means your night won’t be near as fun as mine.”

Tenzou stepped away from his clothes and, for a second, could feel exactly how naked he was in front of Kakashi. Somehow the feeling was liberating.

Tenzou eased onto the bed next to Kakashi, his shoulder just a hair’s breadth away from Kakashi’s. “Thank you for not judging me.”

Kakashi leaned the fractional amount of space necessary to make physical contact. “Don’t worry, what are friends for?”

While Tenzou’s mind stuttered on the words, Kakashi swung himself back onto Tenzou’s lap. The movement was more graceful now that they’d sobered up some, and Tenzou decided to stop thinking for the time being and just kiss Kakashi.

Kakashi’s skin was blissfully warm. Tenzou settled one arm on the back of Kakashi’s arm and the other on his hip. He toyed with the idea of being bold and doing something like grabbing Kakashi’s cock and stroking him then and there or leaving a hickey on Kakashi’s collarbones, but Kakashi beat him to the punch.

Tenzou felt Kakashi’s hand settle on his hip and his fingertips gently drag down in featherlight touches. His nails grazed Tenzou’s inner thighs before coming to rest a mere inch away from the base of Tenzou’s cock.

“Is this okay?” Kakashi asked, “are you still drunk?” His breath tickled Tenzou’s ear so Tenzou took a second to kiss the spot where Kakashi’s neck curved down and became his shoulders, teeth scraping and making Kakashi hum with pleasure.

“It’s okay,” Tenzou said, lips caressing Kakashi’s skin with each word, “I’m sober enough to know I definitely want to continue this.”

Kakashi nodded against the side of Tenzou’s face and his hand wrapped around Tenzou’s cock. Tenzou sighed and closed his eyes and tried to focus on the warmth of Kakashi’s hand. Kakashi started pumping his cock, fingers clumsy and awkward, and it felt nice. However, not as nice as it should. After a few moments Tenzou pulled Kakashi’s hand away and laced their fingers together.

“It’s okay,” Tenzou said again, this time referring to his disappointment of a penis, “don’t worry about it.” He bit his lip for a second and tried to think of something he wanted to do that Kakashi would hopefully enjoy. “Can we just. Can I.. Can I try giving you a blow job?”

Kakashi’s fingers tightened their grip on Tenzou’s. “I would be honored to receive your first blow job.”

Tenzou laughed and leaned back enough to look Kakashi in the eye. He didn’t let go of Kakashi’s hand and Kakashi didn’t make him. “It’s not going to be a good blowjob, I don’t know what I’m doing.”

Kakashi shrugged. “That’s fine, you drooling on my dick still sounds fun.”

Tenzou looked down at Kakashi’s flushed and hard cock and tried to decide on an angle of attack. He knew Kakashi wasn’t as big as him and that was a vague relief. Tenzou licked his lips and opened and closed his mouth a few times.

“How about we start with a condom?” Kakashi offered. “Protects against any nasties I might be giving you and keeps you from getting cum blasted in your face. So a win-win.”

Tenzou nodded and, after a second’s hesitation, let go of Kakashi’s hand and watched as he wiggled and scooted to the edge of the bed and rummaged around in his nightstand. The pictures of Kakashi’s team and father wobbled and Tenzou vaguely wondered if they should turn them around. Before he could say something, Kakashi’s hand emerged with a condom packet pinched between his index and middle fingers. He carefully used the free fingers he had to lay the frames face-down.

Kakashi repositioned himself against the pillows at the head of the bed and tore open the foil package. “Don’t use your teeth to open a condom,” he said without looking up at Tenzou, “it can put holes in it and that defeats the entire purpose.”

Tenzou nodded and clenched the bed spread. His fingers itched to help but Kakashi seemed to have this under control. Kakashi slid back his foreskin and pressed the condom to the tip of his cock before rolling it down to the base, pressing out any air bubbles. Tenzou’s attention was caught between watching Kakashi’s hands and watching the way his toes were curling.

Once the condom was on, Kakashi leaned back on his hands and finally looked up at Tenzou. “Alright, now I’m ready,” he said after a second. “How do you want to proceed?”

“I want to kiss you and figure it out from there,” Tenzou admitted. Kakashi smiled, his teeth flashing.

Tenzou crawled on all fours to the head of the bed where Kakashi was. He wasn’t sure how to initiate the blow job, so he started where he was comfortable, with one hand on Kakashi’s bony hip, the other in his hair, and lips on Kakashi’s mouth.

Kakashi lay down and wrapped his now-free hands around Tenzou’s shoulders. With a light tug, he pulled Tenzou down with him and shifted until Tenzou was half on top of him. Tenzou’s upper thigh brushed Kakashi’s sheathed cock and Kakashi let out a deep breath.

“You’re really turned on right now, aren’t you?” Tenzou asked. Kakashi started kissing Tenzou’s jaw, tongue leaving a wet trail.

“You say that like it’s a bad thing,” Kakashi replied after a moment. Tenzou drug his hand up from Kakashi’s hip to his ribs, pads of his fingers gentle enough that Kakashi shivered. Tenzou smiled. Definitely not a bad thing.

Tenzou sat up enough to kiss Kakashi once on the forehead, then started kissing his way down Kakashi’s body. He began with the familiar territory of Kakashi’s mouth and jaw and neck, then laid a sloppy wet kiss on the dip of one of Kakashi’s collar bone. Next he ran his tongue down Kakashi’s chest, steering clear of Kakashi’s nipples because he wasn’t sure if kissing them was weird or not. As Tenzou started kissing each one of Kakashi’s ribs, Kakashi’s hands wove into his hair. The further down Tenzou moved, the tighter Kakashi’s grip on his hair. By the time Tenzou was grazing his teeth against the dip of Kakashi’s hip, Kakashi had moved his hands out of Tenzou’s hair and begun digging his fingertips into Tenzou’s shoulders. He was careful with his nails though and didn’t break any skin, which Tenzou appreciated.

Kakashi was breathing heavily, and by the looks of his cock through the pink-tinted condom, Tenzou was pretty sure he was already leaking precum. He grinned and placed a particularly hard kiss on Kakashi’s upper thigh. Kakashi’s hands tightened on his shoulders, then moved away.

“Fuck, Tenzou,” Kakashi breathed. Tenzou sat up briefly to see Kakashi still laying back, eyes closed, and hands knotted in the bedspread.

“How the fuck are you so good at foreplay?” Kakashi asked.

Tenzou shrugged then, realizing Kakashi couldn’t see that, said, “I just really like kissing you.”

Kakashi let out a soft breathy sigh and it took Tenzou a moment to realize it had been a laugh.

“Do you need anything from me? Need me to move, sit up, give you pointers?” Kakashi asked. His voice was soft. He sounded almost like he was winded, and Tenzou grinned again. If this alone had made Kakashi so breathless, Tenzou was confident he could get Kakashi to cum without much direction. So, Tenzou didn’t answer.

Instead, he began to gently brush his fingertips up and down Kakashi’s inner thighs. The backs of Tenzou’s fingers grazed his balls and Kakashi made a sound he muffled with the back of his hand. Tenzou closed his eyes for a second and thought back to what Kakashi had done on the roof. After a moment Tenzou pressed the flats of his palms against Kakashi’s thighs. Kakashi understood the motion and spread his legs far enough apart that, just like how Kakashi had done prior, Tenzou could lay in the space between.

Kakashi’s cock patiently waited mere inches from his face while Tenzou racked his mind for other things. He put one hand on Kakashi’s hip to keep him from thrusting up and, after a moment’s hesitation, found Kakashi’s other hand tangled in the blanket.

Kakashi’s cock twitched and Tenzou decided to take the plunge. He swallowed and wrapped his mouth around Kakashi’s tip and sucked as hard as he could.

Kakashi’s back arched and fingernails dug into Tenzou’s hand and he moaned, voice ragged and loud. For a moment Tenzou was fairly certain that, had he himself been hard, Kakashi’s reaction alone would have made him cum.

Tenzou sucked again, hard enough to make his throat sore, and Kakashi moaned some more. His legs sandwiched Tenzou’s head and Tenzou smiled around Kakashi’s cock.

Tenzou let go of Kakashi’s cock for a moment--Kakashi made a quiet whining noise--and took a breath before taking as much cock in as he could.

The effect was immediate: Kakashi sat up on his elbows and gasped “wait” right as Tenzou’s gag reflex kicked in and he heaved a mouthful of half-digested noodles onto Kakashi’s cock and bed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, Kakashi and Yamato aren't allowed to have nice things.


	8. Chapter 8

Tenzou sat up and leaned back on his heels. He wiped his mouth with his hand and looked down at Kakashi’s lap, where his cock proudly poked out of a pile of bile and noodles and vegetables.

“I’m so sorry,” Tenzou whispered. He couldn’t take his eyes off the carnage. His mouth tasted like death and probably smelled it too.

Kakashi sat up and looked down at his lap as well. “Honestly, I should have warned you that deep-throating is an advanced level sex move. Like, jonin level of the sex ranking system. I didn’t even try to deep throat you that one time.”

Tenzou nodded silently.

“Can you get me a wet rag or something?” Kakashi asked. Tenzou rolled off the bed and retreated to the kitchenette. He suddenly felt embarrassingly naked and very cold, but he hoped that was just because of the freezing hardwood under his bare feet.

When he turned around, Kakashi had already pulled his blanket off the bed and left it in a pile on the floor. The vomit hadn’t soaked through to the bottom sheet, so Kakashi simply pulled another blanket from his closet and threw it onto the bed. He was still remarkably hard, Tenzou noticed, and briefly he wondered if Kakashi had some weird vomiting kink.

He handed the rag to Kakashi and was careful to not look Kakashi in the eye. He could feel Kakashi watching him, so he started to pull on his pants.

“I’m going to go wash out my mouth and, um, take the blanket down to the laundry room since it stinks,” Tenzou said before Kakashi could say anything, and then he was out the door.

 

In the bathroom, Tenzou rinsed his mouth out a record fifteen times. He couldn’t taste the bile anymore but his throat still felt raw and burned. At this point, though, he was just avoiding facing Kakashi again. Tenzou splashed water onto his face and watched it run down to his chin in the mirror. Behind him someone that looked pretty familiar walked in. Potentially one of his roommates.

“Looks like you’re having a rough night,” the guy said as he passed by and briefly clapped Tenzou’s shoulder. He was still shirtless, he realized, and the sudden contact was jarring. The last person to touch him there was Kakashi, who specifically did so using his mouth.

Tenzou didn’t reply but his maybe-roommate didn’t seem to notice. Instead the guy continued talking. “Night’s still young though, so you should go get laid or something. At least that’s what I’m planning on doing.”

The guy was peeing in a urinal and wasn’t facing Tenzou. That was a relief because Tenzou was pretty sure there was a preposition in the guy’s suggestion and he definitely grimaced in response.

Tenzou left without a word and returned to Kakashi’s room; he needed to at least give Kakashi a decent apology and get the rest of his clothes.

 

“Here I was worrying you had either gotten lost or were practicing blow jobs somewhere else,” Kakashi said as soon as Tenzou opened the door. Kakashi’s tone was light so Tenzou chanced a glance away from his sandals.

Kakashi was sitting cross-legged in the middle of his bed, vomit cleaned off his thighs, still fairly hard and completely naked. The condom was gone and Tenzou furrowed his eyebrows.

“I feel like I’m getting mixed signals,” Tenzou admitted, “I threw up on you but you’re definitely still naked.” He closed the door. “And look like you’re still interested in getting off.”

“I’m always interested in getting off, honestly.” Kakashi smiled at him, eye squinting. Tenzou sighed and Kakashi continued, “so I figured we could still mess around. See if maybe vomiting restored your ability to get it up. Honestly I’ve had grosser things happen to me during sex. A kunoichi sneezed right into my eye while she was bouncing on my dick.”

Tenzou smiled at the image, then bit his lip. “Are you sure you still want to, um, mess around?”

Kakashi nodded, his messy dirty hair bouncing up and down, and patted the spot next to him on the bed. Tenzou sat down and, after a moment, forced himself to look Kakashi in the eye.

“I’ll never give you a blowjob again,” Tenzou said.

Kakashi’s upper lip curled. “Don’t say mean things like that.” Tenzou snorted and Kakashi continued, “Nobody gives amazing blowjobs their first time around. Or second or third or fourth. And honestly throwing up on somebody is not unheard of.”

Tenzou opened his mouth to reply, then thought better of it. He decided to see if Kakashi was really telling the truth and he did want to continue this, so he shifted forward and kissed him. Kakashi kissed back. Tenzou sighed and ran his fingers through Kakashi’s hair.

“How many times did you rinse your mouth? I can’t even tell you barfed,” Kakashi said when they parted.

“I forget. I think fifteen times or so. My throat still feels like hell.” Tenzou brushed his lips against Kakashi’s.

Kakashi climbed onto Tenzou’s lap for the third time that night and pushed Tenzou’s shoulders until he was laying down. “Your throat probably hurts because you were sucking too much and too hard. Don’t do that.” Kakashi followed Tenzou down so they were chest to chest and propped himself up on his elbows on either side of Tenzou’s neck, fingertips grazing the hair just above Tenzou’s ears.

Tenzou opened his mouth to argue; Kakashi had clearly enjoyed having Tenzou suck his cock based on the sounds he made in response alone. Kakashi didn’t let Tenzou talk and instead took advantage of his open mouth by planting a wet and sloppy kiss that left Tenzou quite distracted.

“I want you to touch me,” Kakashi said against Tenzou’s jaw. “Please. This night has been a mess and I need you to help me cum.”

Tenzou allowed himself to read too much into what Kakashi said for a few moments. Kakashi needed him. Wanted him. Desired him. Tenzou silently scolded his own uncooperative cock, then put his hands on Kakashi’s hard and narrow hips. His skin was warm and soft against Tenzou’s palms. Tenzou started rubbing circles against Kakashi’s hip bones again. After breathing against Tenzou’s neck for a moment, Kakashi started kissing him on the lips again.

Tenzou ran one hand around Kakashi’s hip and briefly gripped the flesh of Kakashi’s ass before trailing his fingertips up Kakashi’s knobby spine. Then, with considerable coordination, Tenzou found where Kakashi’s hand was gripping the blanket next to his head and pressed his palm against Kakashi’s wrist. The position was awkward and Tenzou was fairly sure his arm would be sore in the morning if they held it too long, but he didn’t care.

Tenzou lightly scraped the nails of his other hand against Kakashi’s thigh. Kakashi shivered and his breath caught, but they didn’t stop kissing. Instead, Kakashi’s teeth grazed Tenzou’s lower lip as Tenzou’s hand wrapped around the base of his cock.

The friction of dry skin on skin was gone by Tenzou’s third languid jerk as Kakashi’s cock started leaking precum again. Vaguely in the back of his mind Tenzou was aware that it was dripping onto his pants, but he couldn’t devote much attention to that when Kakashi had readjusted their hands so their fingers were laced together and was making soft senseless noises against Tenzou’s mouth.

With the friction gone, Tenzou began to pick up pace and Kakashi followed suit, rolling his hips down so he was fucking into Tenzou’s hand. Tenzou fought to create and maintain a rhythm and, when he squeezed a little tighter, Kakashi moaned into his mouth.

“Fuck, Tenzou,” Kakashi hissed. He buried his face into the crook of Tenzou’s neck and started thrusting down into Tenzou’s palm harder and faster. Kakashi flung his free hand out out to the side and gripped the footboard of the bed.

Tenzou tightened his grip a tiny bit more and Kakashi muffled a groan by pressing his open mouth to Tenzou’s shoulder, his thrusts turning erratic as he came on Tenzou’s palm and pants.

Kakashi’s cock softened in Tenzou’s hand before he collapsed on top of Tenzou like a ragdoll. After a second’s consideration, Tenzou wiped his hand on a pillowcase that was within reach before wrapping his arm around Kakashi’s waist. Tenzou’s other hand was still palm-to-palm with Kakashi’s hand next to his head, and Tenzou didn’t feel like untangling their fingers.

“Was it good?” Tenzou asked. His voice was soft. He wasn’t sure why he was whispering.

Kakashi’s laugh rumbled against Tenzou’s chest so he felt it before he heard it. “Very good,” Kakashi whispered back. He shifted slightly, adjusting where his head was buried in the crook of Tenzou’s neck, and then sighed. Tenzou squeezed Kakashi tighter for a second, then loosened his grip enough that Kakashi could leave Tenzou’s embrace if he wanted to. Kakashi didn’t leave though, and instead he fell asleep in Tenzou’s arms.

“Can we do this again sometime?” Tenzou whispered. “A lot of times?”

Kakashi hummed. “I like you too much to stop.”

Tenzou wasn’t sure if Kakashi had answered in his sleep or not, and after a moment he decided he didn’t want to know. Instead, he stared up at the ceiling and imagined a life where he held Kakashi each and every night as they slept. It only took a few minutes for Tenzou’s fantasy to morph into a dream.

 

Raw sunlight was streaming in through Kakashi’s windows when Tenzou awoke. They had left the blinds open and, for a brief moment, Tenzou worried that people had been able to see their somewhat embarrassing activities the night before. Well, embarrassing on Tenzou’s part at least. Tenzou blinked the sleep from his eyes and decided he didn’t care if they had been seen.

Tenzou thought watching people as they slept was weird (not to mention it always reminded him of assassination missions) but he didn't want to move quite yet. So, he closed his eyes again and focused on how warm Kakashi's naked skin was against his, on the calm weight of Kakashi's head on his reasonably-numb bicep, and on how unguarded Kakashi's breaths were. It wasn't much different from the last time they had shared a bed, and Tenzou realized that the feeling of waking up next to Kakashi was something he would never grow bored of.

Tenzou wasn't sure how long he lay there and let Kakashi sleep against him, but judging by the chirps of the birds and the sound of fresh ANBU recruits doing drills outside it was mid-morning by the time Kakashi started moving.

Tenzou could feel Kakashi shift next to him, the weight lift from his arm (and tingly blood flowing back into the numb limb), joints crackling and popping, and finally Kakashi's morning-breath mouth pressing a closed-lip kiss to Tenzou's chin.

"What are you smiling at?" Kakashi asked. His voice was rough and slow.

Tenzou didn't reply, and instead opened his eyes and rolled over to kiss Kakashi, mouths wet and smelly and not coordinated at all.

Tenzou wanted so much, but he knew Kakashi couldn't give him that. So for now, and maybe forever, this was enough; Tenzou left the I-love-you's unsaid, but held under his tongue for safe-keeping.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm considering writing a PWP one-shot about Yamato losing his virginity, so keep your eyes peeled if that's something you'd be into.


End file.
